- List of Roseanne episodes
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This is a complete list of Roseanne episodes. Roseanne was an American sitcom which aired on ABC from 1988 to 1997.
Contents
Series overview
Season Episodes Originally aired DVD Release Season premiere Season finale Region 1 Region 2 Region 4 1 23 October 18, 1988 May 2, 1989 August 30, 2005 September 19, 2005 June 7, 2006 2 24 September 12, 1989 May 8, 1990 December 6, 2005 February 6, 2006 October 4, 2006 3 25 September 18, 1990 May 14, 1991 March 21, 2006 May 15, 2006 February 7, 2007 4 25 September 17, 1991 May 12, 1992 June 27, 2006 March 17, 2007 June 6, 2007 5 25 September 15, 1992 May 18, 1993 September 12, 2006 September 9, 2009 November 7, 2007 6 25 September 14, 1993 May 24, 1994 December 5, 2006 September 9, 2009 March 18, 2008 7 26 September 21, 1994 May 24, 1995 April 3, 2007 October 12, 2009 July 9, 2008 8 25 September 19, 1995 May 21, 1996 August 7, 2007 October 12, 2009 January 13, 2010 9 24 September 17, 1996 May 20, 1997 October 16, 2007 November 16, 2009 January 13, 2010 Season 1 (1988−1989)
Order Title Writer(s) Director Original airdate Code 1-101 "Life and Stuff" Matt Williams [1] Ellen Falcon October 18, 1988 101 Roseanne and Dan, parents of a low income family, deal with the trials and tribulations of suburban domesticity. Roseanne must keep her sanity while keeping her family together and dealing with her troubling daughter, Darlene. 2-102 "We're in the Money" David McFadzean Ellen Falcon October 25, 1988 201 They're in the money. Dan brings home some extra cash which leads the family to consider how they will spend it. After considering being responsible, the couple secretly make purchases based on their own desires. 3-103 "D-I-V-O-R-C-E" Lauren Eve Anderson Ellen Falcon November 1, 1988 205 It's Two for One Tuesday at the Lanford Inn and Roseanne is planning a reservation. Dan, although not particularly happy, agrees to go with Roseanne to a nice dinner for two. While at the dinner, Roseanne & Dan discover an interesting piece of news about their old friend Patsy. 4-104 "Language Lessons" Laurie Gelman Ellen Falcon November 22, 1988 208 Dan is irritated with Jackie and her meddling ways. Anything that she says is grating on his nerves, so when she says that his "special chili" is bland, he loses it. Roseanne is caught in the middle, as the two of them pull her in each direction for support. The arguing explodes, and Roseanne is left to straighten it all out. 5-105 "Radio Days" Laurie Gelman Ellen Falcon November 29, 1988 206 When a local radio station offers a country western song writing contest, Dan digs through trash to find Roseanne's treasure. Dan finds one of Roseanne's poems that could be the perfect fit for the contest. In the meantime, Becky and Darlene fight over their room space, while Booker chases down Jackie. 6-106 "Lovers' Lane" Danny Jacobson Ellen Falcon December 6, 1988 209 A Friday night of fun begins as Roseanne and her family travel to the bowling alley. Becky deals with the problems of most teenagers as she is interested in a boy at the bowling alley and is afraid of the embarrassment that might occur due to her mother. In the meantime Jackie and Booker raise the stakes in their friendly game of bowling. 7-107 "The Memory Game" Grace McKeaney Ellen Falcon December 13, 1988 202 Dan has a photographer coming over to the house to take a family portrait for his upcoming high school reunion newsletter. Everyone is dressed up and ready, when Jackie 'spills the beans' that Dan had cheated on Roseanne long ago with her nemesis. The smiles soon turn to tears and glares, as the picture is snapped. 8-108 "Here's to Good Friends" Danny Jacobson Ellen Falcon December 20, 1988 207 Crystal chases down pink squirrels to pass the time she spends thinking of herself negatively. Roseanne & Jackie take their friend out to show her she is a good soul however she needs to stop letting people walk all over her. Meanwhile, Darlene is stuck at home doing a report for her American history class while the rest of the family watches football. 9-109 "Dan's Birthday Bash" Grace McKeaney[2] Ellen Falcon January 3, 1989 210 Happy Birthday Dan! Roseanne and the kids surprise Dan with an extensive birthday breakfast. Later on in the evening, Roseanne throws Dan a party at the Lobo. During the party Dan comes close to being violent but is stopped by Roseanne. Afraid that he will look like a wimp Dan vows that he will beat up the billiards bully the next time he sees him. Becky is invited to Chip's for a dinner. 10-110 "Saturday" David McFadzean Ellen Falcon January 10, 1989 204 A Saturday at the Conners means chilling out at relaxing but Dan believes he can conquer fixing the truck while relaxing. Roseanne & Dan place a friendly wager to see if Dan and the gang can fix the truck in the afternoon. 11-111 "Canoga Time" David McFadzean Ellen Falcon January 17, 1989 212 Dan can't bear to part with the "junk" Roseanne wants to donate to a rummage sale, so Roseanne proposes a deal. Darlene forges a passing grade on her report card, and tries to pass it off, to no avail. 12-112 "The Monday Thru Friday Show" Danny Jacobson Ellen Falcon January 24, 1989 213 Dan and Roseanne disagree about where to spend a romantic 15th anniversary; Becky refuses to dissect a frog in biology class; Darlene finds her paper route more than she can handle. 13-113 "Bridge Over Troubled Sonny" Laurie Gelman Ellen Falcon January 31, 1989 211 Crystal struggles to cope with the death of her husband, who is buried in the bridge that Jackie drove them over on the way to work. Roseanne struggles with the secret that she knows about Sonny, that she wants to tell Crystal. Darlene decides it's cool to smoke, until Roseanne finds her pack of cigarettes. 14-114 "Father's Day" Lauren Eve Anderson Ellen Falcon February 7, 1989 214 Dan's father shows up bearing gifts, and all are thrilled to see him, except Dan himself. As the visit drags on for them, the insults are hurled in Dan's direction and Roseanne steps in between the two of them to deflect any further damage. Dan sees his father's philosophy of "Work smart, not hard" as a direct put-down on his life, while his father sees it as caring advice. 15-115 "Nightmare on Oak Street" Grace McKeaney John Pasquin February 14, 1989 215 The girls watch a slasher-horror film, and Roseanne has been losing sleep, due to what she believes are Darlene's re-occurring nightmares. When the truth is revealed, that the scary movie isn't behind the insomnia, Roseanne learns that Darlene is entering puberty. 16-116 "Mall Story" Laurie Gelman John Sgueglia February 21, 1989 216 It's time for the annual Lanford Mall-A-Thon and Roseanne and her gang are ready to scout out the deals and spend a lovely Saturday in retail heaven. Roseanne takes her family as she realizes Dan needs new shoes, Becky needs a dress, and Roseanne just needs a day to escape work. Jackie converses 17-117 "Becky's Choice" Laurie Gelman, David Jacobson John Sgueglia February 28, 1989 218 Bachelor 1 or Bachelor 2? Becky must decide between her first crush, Chip, and the infamous "Tongue Bandit". The decision worsens when Roseanne & Dan invite Chip's parents over for a family dinner. Later on, Becky is caught with the other guy in the backyard. 18-118 "Slice of Life" Lauren Eve Anderson, David McFadzean John Sgueglia March 7, 1989 217 Becky is getting ready for a big slumber party, and Darlene is getting ready to pitch the big game. Darlene is extremely moody, and argues with Roseanne before slamming out of the house. After Roseanne gets a phone call that Darlene is under going emergency surgery, she becomes wrecked with guilt over the morning's fight. 19-119 "Workin' Overtime" Bill Pentland Ellen Falcon March 14, 1989 203 The Wellman Plastics group is growing tired as Booker continues to lengthen the worker's shifts due to quotas, factory mistakes, etc. Roseanne, queen of the group, cannot take it any longer. When Roseanne completes another long day of work and comes home to the everyday craziness, she must escape and take a breather. 20-120 "Toto, We're Not in Kansas Anymore" Grace McKeaney John Sgueglia March 28, 1989 219 As a tornado spins through Lanford, a storm is brewing inside the Conner house over the whereabouts of Jackie who hasn't returned from her trip to the market. 21-121 "Death and Stuff" Bill Pentland John Sgueglia April 11, 1989 220 During the family's busy weekend activities, a door-to-door salesman drops by — and then drops dead in the Conner kitchen. Meanwhile, they are expecting company, potential buyers for the washer and dryer, and the coroner is taking his time getting the body out of the Conner kitchen. 22-122 "Dear Mom and Dad" Danny Jacobson John Sgueglia April 18, 1989 221 An unannounced visit by Roseanne's parents has the Conner house in an uproar. Dan and Jackie are pushing a usually outspoken Roseanne to stick up for herself, because she is now at a loss for words. Hostility and stir-craziness abound, but the biggest shock comes when Bev announces that they are moving to Lanford. 23-123 "Let's Call It Quits" Grace McKeaney Ellen Falcon May 2, 1989 222 Roseanne has difficulty accepting new rules from a tough new supervisor at the factory. After he raises the cap on the quotas yet again, Roseanne approaches him to try and get him to ease off. The boss agrees, but he needs a favor from her, in return. They come to a temporary agreement that results in a permanent solution. Season 2 (1989−1990)
Order Title Writer(s) Director Original airdate Code 24-201 "Inherit the Wind" Allan Katz John Pasquin September 12, 1989 301 Becky suffers major public embarrassment at school when she breaks wind during a presentation before her fellow students, and soon becomes the laughing stock of Lanford High School. 25-202 "The Little Sister" Joss Whedon John Pasquin September 19, 1989 303 Roseanne refuses to support Jackie's new career choice: being a police officer. This leads to a huge fight between the pair. In the end, Roseanne finally reveals why she is so opposed to the idea. She fears that Jackie might be killed. 26-203 "Guilt by Disassociation" Tom Arnold John Pasquin September 26, 1989 302 Roseanne, seeking a better job than her current telemarketing position, nearly lands what seems like ideal employment. She calls everyone and they plan a surprise party for her. Sadly, she loses the job when she reveals she cannot work a computer, and feels worthless. 28-204 "Somebody Stole My Gal" Martin Pasko & Rebecca Parr John Pasquin October 10, 1989 306 After Roseanne is offered a temporary job by Dan's boss, she invites him to dinner with the family. Once he arrives, the Conners feel awkward as he lavishes them with gifts and begins to spend too much time at their house. 27-205 "House of Grown-Ups" Joss Whedon John Pasquin October 3, 1989 304 The Conners get their first VCR. Roseanne has a difficult time accepting Jackie's departure to police training camp. Becky goes to a high school party, but brings Darlene with, causing her to be disgusted when she comes home. 29-206 "Five of a Kind" Norma Safford Vela, Danny Jacobson John Pasquin October 24, 1989 308 One of Dan's poker buddies gives Roseanne a passionate kiss. 30-207 "BOO!" Norma Safford Vela John Pasquin October 31, 1989 307 It's the Conners' favorite holiday – Halloween! Dan and Roseanne engage in a massive prank war, and everyone helps out to make the Conner house the spookiest one on the block. 31-208 "Sweet Dreams" Danny Jacobson John Pasquin November 7, 1989 305 Roseanne just wants to spend five minutes in her bathtub, alone. When this denied, she fantasizes about a "perfect" life, which mainly involves her being pampered and murdering her family. She must defend her actions in a huge, full-cast musical number. 32-209 "We Gather Together" Danny Jacobson John Pasquin November 21, 1989 309 The Conner clan gathers for an unforgettable Thanksgiving dinner, in which Jackie tries to hide the fact that she is a policewoman from her parents. 33-210 "Brain-Dead Poets Society" Joss Whedon John Pasquin November 28, 1989 310 Darlene writes a poem for school and wins a prize. She is asked to read it at a special assembly but is reluctant to do so until Roseanne coaxes her by sharing her own poetry journals. In the end, Darlene's poem reveals her true, pained nature. 34-211 "Lobocop" Tom Arnold John Pasquin December 5, 1989 311 When Roseanne gets a second job at the Lobo lounge, she discovers that Dan and herself are spending too much time apart, and turns to Jackie for support. 35-212 "No Talking" Norma Safford Vela John Pasquin December 12, 1989 312 Becky and Roseanne are engaged in a particularly nasty string of fights. This leads to a war of silence between the pair. 36-213 "Chicken Hearts" Joss Whedon John Pasquin January 2, 1990 313 Roseanne has found a new job working at a fast food restaurant. When her obnoxious teenage boss annoys her, she tries to butter him up by inviting him over for dinner. His nasty attitude soon convinces everyone that Roseanne deserves to be treated better. 37-214 "One for the Road" Sheree Guitar John Pasquin January 9, 1990 314 Becky and a friend decide to experiment with alcohol one afternoon. Darlene actually protects her sister for once, but in the end, Roseanne finds out from the friend's mother. This leads to a serious discussion. 38-215 "An Officer and a Gentleman" Norma Safford Vela John Pasquin January 23, 1990 315 Jackie runs the house while Roseanne is away with her father after he fractures a hip. 39-216 "Born to Be Wild" Stephen Paymer John Pasquin January 30, 1990 316 An old biker friend of the Conners comes roaring into town. He makes the pair feel old and fat with his wild lifestyle. In the end, they learn that while their lives are not what they had planned, they still feel fulfillment. 40-217 "Hair" Danny Jacobson, Norma Safford Vela John Pasquin February 6, 1990 317 Roseanne keeps her new job sweeping floors in a beauty parlor despite her humiliation. 41-218 "I'm Hungry" Danny Jacobson, Norma Safford Vela John Pasquin February 13, 1990 318 Roseanne decides to go on a diet when her pants will not fit one morning. She convinces Dan to diet with her. Can the Conners resist the delicious temptations in their kitchen? 42-219 "All of Me" Danny Jacobson, Norma Safford Vela John Pasquin February 20, 1990 319 Jackie has finally found 'the one',but Roseanne's meddling in her sister's life explodes in her face. 43-220 "To Tell the Truth" Danny Jacobson, Norma Safford Vela John Pasquin February 27, 1990 320 Jackie gives Roseanne the silent treatment when she has enough of her meddling in her lovelife, but the sisters reconcile. As the ending credits roll there are photographs of the wedding of Prince Charles and Diana Princess of Wales. 44-221 "Fender Bender" Penelope Spheeris, Bill Gerber John Pasquin March 20, 1990 322 After they are both involved in a fender bender, Roseanne tells her former employer, Mrs. Wellman, a thing or two. 45-222 "April Fool's Day" Steve Paymer John Pasquin April 10, 1990 323 Dan and Roseanne are in a panic to get their tax returns filed by deadline. 46-223 "Fathers and Daughters" Joss Whedon John Pasquin May 1, 1990 324 In an effort to get closer to Becky and Darlene, Roseanne and Dan stray into new terrain. Roseanne spends more time with Darlene, and Dan with Becky, which does not have the intended results. 47-224 "Happy Birthday" Geraldine Barr, Maxine Epstein [3] John Pasquin May 8, 1990 321 Roseanne's 37th birthday prompts her family to build her a writing room where she can take up writing again. Roseanne is overjoyed, but finds herself stricken with writer's block. Season 3 (1990−1991)
Order Title Writer(s) Director Original airdate Code 48-301 "The Test" Bob Myer John Whitesell September 18, 1990 401 While the Conners are anxiously awaiting the results of Roseanne's pregnancy test they all share their differing opinions on whether or not she should have the baby. Dan is reluctant to give Becky driving lessons. 49-302 "Friends and Relatives" Chuck Lorre John Whitesell September 25, 1990 402 Dan loans $1500 to Arnie thinking he's going to buy Nancy an engagement ring but then he uses it to buy her breast implants. When Dan starts falling behind in the bills Jackie tries to loan him the money but he refuses to borrow money from her because she's a relative. DJ starts peeping on his sisters. 50-303 "Like a Virgin" Brad Isaacs John Whitesell October 2, 1990 404 Roseanne and Dan think it's time to give Becky a lesson about birth control but are shocked to catch Darlene making out on their couch. 51-304 "Like, a New Job" Jeff Abugov John Whitesell October 9, 1990 403 Roseanne quits her job at the hair salon when she gets a new job as a waitress at Rodbell's department store. Becky and Darlene are fighting over their room so Dan sends Darlene to live in the basement. 52-305 "Goodbye Mr. Right" Bruce Graham John Whitesell October 16, 1990 405 Gary gives Jackie an ultimatum when she's injured in the line of duty. Becky and Darlene start to think that DJ's a psycho when they discover his secret stash of dismembered dolls under his bed. 53-306 "Becky, Beds and Boys" Jennifer Heath, Amy Sherman-Palladino John Whitesell October 23, 1990 406 Roseanne and Dan are in the market for a new bed. Becky starts seeing a rebellious teen named Mark. 54-307 "Trick or Treat" Chuck Lorre John Whitesell October 30, 1990 407 Roseanne dresses as a male trucker for Halloween and for fun mingles with some guys at the Lobo Lounge. Dan is upset about DJ wanting to be a witch for Halloween. 55-308 "PMS, I Love You" Tom Arnold John Whitesell November 6, 1990 408 Roseanne's PMS coincides with Dan's birthday. He would rather avoid it by going fishing, but his family insists on throwing him a surprise party. 56-309 "Bird is the Word" Joel Madison, Don Foster John Whitesell November 13, 1990 409 Becky is suspended for allegedly making an obscene gesture in her class photo – which makes her suddenly popular at school – but Roseanne is the one called into the principal's office. 57-310 "Dream Lover" Chuck Lorre John Whitesell November 27, 1990 410 When Dan starts dreaming about another woman, Roseanne feels threatened, and decides to meet this woman at Rodbell's. 58-311 "Do You Know Where Your Parents Are?" David A. Caplan, Brian LaPan John Whitesell December 4, 1990 411 When Becky and Darlene break curfew, Dan and Roseanne try to teach them a lesson by staying out late and sending Jackie over to make sure they worry. 59-312 "Confessions" Brad Isaacs John Whitesell December 18, 1990 412 When Roseanne's mom pays her a surprise visit, she tricks Jackie into coming over for a share of the torture. As their visit drags on, Roseanne is crushed to hear that Bev thought that Jackie always had more potential than the ordinary Roseanne. 60-313 "The Courtship of Eddie, Dan's Father" Don Foster & Joel Madison (teleplay), Bob Myer (story) John Whitesell January 8, 1991 413 Dan's father Eddie surprises the family with an uninvited visit, revealing that he and Crystal are romantically involved. Dan doesn't take it well, especially when they announce they're getting married. 61-314 "The Wedding" Jeff Abugov John Whitesell January 15, 1991 414 Crystal gives a shock announcement: she's pregnant! Her pregnancy is taking a toll on Dan, who can't accept the unlikely courtship, but puts the animosity aside to attend Eddie and Crystal's wedding ceremony. 62-315 "Becky Doesn't Live Here Anymore" Amy Sherman-Palladino, Jennifer Heath Gail Mancuso January 22, 1991 415 Becky runs away from home to live with Jackie after lying about not seeing Mark. 63-316 "Home-Ec" Mark Lloyd Rappaport John Whitesell February 5, 1991 416 Roseanne gives Darlene's classmates a crash course in home economics when she takes them on a trip to the supermarket, much to Darlene's embarrassment.
Notes: Leonardo DiCaprio guest stars as Darlene's classmate, though he doesn't speak.64-317 "Valentine's Day" Bob Myer John Whitesell February 12, 1991 417 Roseanne awaits a special gift from Dan for Valentine's day. Darlene is disappointed when a boy she has a crush on asks Becky to the dance instead.
Notes: Tobey Maguire guest stars as a friend of Barry, the boy Darlene has a crush on.65-318 "Communicable Theater" Jennifer Heath, Amy Sherman-Palladino John Whitesell February 19, 1991 418 A crash course on 'Cyrano de Bergerac' has Jackie struggling to remember her lines for the play, but Roseanne lends a more-than-helpful hand. 66-319 "Vegas Interruptus" Bob Myer (story)
Jeff Abugov, Chuck Lorre (teleplay)John Whitesell February 26, 1991 419 Roseanne and Dan's trip to Vegas is interrupted by a snow storm. 67-320 "Her Boyfriend's Back" Brad Isaacs, Maxine Lapiduss, Sheldon Krasner, David Saling John Whitesell March 12, 1991 420 When Mark and Becky ride Dan's vintage motorcycle without asking, Dan hits the roof and Roseanne orders a showdown at Mark's house. 68-321 "Troubles with the Rubbles" Joel Madison John Whitesell March 26, 1991 421 Roseanne feels humiliated when Kathy Bowman, her new neighbor, looks down on her like white trash and says that DJ is a bad influence on her son, Todd. 69-322 "Second Time Around" Maxine Lapiduss John Whitesell April 2, 1991 422 Roseanne assists Crystal in her Lamaze classes. After a near-fatal accident at work, DJ follows Dan around obsessively. Jackie is offended when she finds out that Roseanne and Dan don't think she's responsible enough to take care of their kids if they die. 70-323 "Dances with Darlene" Brad Isaacs Gail Mancuso April 30, 1991 425 Roseanne tries to persuade Darlene to wear something feminine and formal to her school dance, but Darlene shows no interest. 71-324 "Scenes from a Barbecue" Bob Myer, Chuck Lorre John Whitesell May 7, 1991 423 The Conners hold a barbecue for Mother's day, where feisty Nana Mary displays her acts of motherhood on Bev, surprising Roseanne and Jackie of how alike their relationships are. 72-325 "The Pied Piper of Lanford" Jeff Abugov John Whitesell May 14, 1991 424 Roseanne and Dan ponder over opening their own business; a motorcycle shop, alongside their friend who gets cold feet at the last minute, but leaves behind a generous token of gratitude, coming in the form of $20,000. Season 4 (1991−1992)
Order Title Writer(s) Director Original airdate Code 73-401 "A Bitter Pill to Swallow" Amy Sherman-Palladino, Jennifer Heath Andrew D. Weyman September 17, 1991 501 When Becky comes to Jackie and Roseanne for advice on birth control, Roseanne tries to remain calm, until Becky reveals that she has already slept with Mark. 74-402 "Take My Bike ... Please!" Bob Myer, Mark Rosewater Andrew D. Weyman September 24, 1991 504 Dan and Roseanne leave Becky in charge at home when they start working 15 hour days. DJ starts to feel neglected. 75-403 "Why Jackie Becomes a Trucker" Chuck Lorre Andrew D. Weyman October 1, 1991 502 Jackie is horrified when she realizes that she's slept with Arnie after getting drunk. Roseanne tries endlessly to get rid of DJ's new dog. Dan and his pals discover Leon's gay when they invite him to their poker game. 76-404 "Darlene Fades to Black" Jeff Abugov Andrew D. Weyman October 8, 1991 503 Darlene slips into a depressive state, constantly searching for alone time away from her parents and siblings. Meanwhile, Becky has her eye on one of Dan's bikes. 77-405 "Tolerate Thy Neighbor" Maxine Lapiduss, Martin Mull Andrew D. Weyman October 15, 1991 505 Roseanne's witnesses the Bowman's possessions being donated to (what she believes) charity while they're out of town. When they return they find their house has been robbed and are angered at Roseanne for letting it happen. 78-406 "Trick Me Up, Trick Me Down" Amy Sherman-Palladino Andrew D. Weyman October 29, 1991 506 When Dan and Roseanne play a gruesome Halloween prank on Kathy Bowman, Roseanne is worried that Kathy might get her revenge later in the night. At the Halloween party in the lodge, Jackie discovers that the moose she has been flirting with is really Booker. 79-407 "Vegas" Don Foster, Sid Youngers Andrew D. Weyman November 5, 1991 507 Arnie and Nancy invite Roseanne and Dan to their wedding in Las Vegas. Roseanne and Dan get into a big fight when she pulls him out of a lucky game. 80-408 "Vegas, Vegas" Joel Madison, Mark Rosewater Andrew D. Weyman November 12, 1991 508 Roseanne's upset with Dan because he'd rather play a game of craps instead of spending a romantic evening with her. Later she gets drunk with Nancy and walks into a Wayne Newton performance yelling rude remarks thinking that he's just an impersonater. During Arnie's and Nancy's wedding, Dan and Roseanne get to renew their vows. 81-409 "Stressed to Kill" Maxine Lapiduss, Bob Myer, Chuck Lorre Andrew D. Weyman November 19, 1991 510 Roseanne's life is becoming more stressful and she decides to take up smoking again while trying to hide it from her family. Roseanne is excited when Darlene gets a B on a school report, until she finds out that Becky actually wrote it for her. 82-410 "Thanksgiving '91" Brad Isaacs Andrew D. Weyman November 26, 1991 509 Roseanne and Jackie find out during Thanksgiving dinner that not only has their father been cheating on Bev for twenty years but she has never done anything about it even though she's known about it for years. 83-411 "Kansas City, Here We Come" Don Foster, Jennifer Heath, Amy Sherman-Palladino, David Forbes Andrew D. Weyman December 3, 1991 511 Jackie and Roseanne hit the road for Kansas City to meet their father's mistress. Dan goes to beat up Becky's boss after he's extremely rude to her, only to discover that Mark has already taken care of it. 84-412 "Santa Claus" Chuck Lorre, Maxine Lapiduss, Barry Vigon Andrew D. Weyman December 24, 1991 512 Roseanne and Jackie are the new Santa and Mrs. Claus at Rodbell's. Darlene's parents are overjoyed to hear about her new friend, Karen, until they find out that she's Roseanne's age. 85-413 "Bingo" Joel Madison, Sid Youngers, Tom Arnold, Robert Miranda Andrew D. Weyman January 7, 1992 513 Crystal invites Roseanne to bingo and leaves Becky & Darlene to care for little Ed. After Roseanne wins in her first game she becomes addicted. In the meantime, Roseanne's rude behavior angers Crystal and the two have a fight. Later, we learn why Crystal's so emotional: She's pregnant and is stressed over the thought of taking care of a teenaged son, a young infant, and a bun in the oven by herself due to her husband being away on business all the time. 86-414 "The Bowling Show" Don Foster Andrew D. Weyman January 21, 1992 514 Dan and Arnie struggle to bring their team out of last place, while Roseanne feels shut out of Jackie and Nancy's new friendship. Darlene meets David for the first time (but in this episode he's referred to as Kevin) 87-415 "The Back Story" Bob Myer Andrew D. Weyman February 4, 1992 515 When Roseanne throws her back out, Bev arrives to help. Dan is excited that he has a rare opportunity to spoil his kids when he secretly buys DJ a Super Nintendo for his 10th birthday and strikes a car-buying deal with Becky, but is upset when Bev swoops in and beats him to the punch. 88-416 "Less is More" Amy Sherman-Palladino Gail Mancuso February 11, 1992 517 Roseanne's doctor recommends she get a breast reduction to reduce stress on her back. After having a nightmare in which her breasts become much larger (with a cameo appearance by Doogie Howser, MD), Roseanne decides to go through with the reduction surgery. 89-417 "Breaking Up is Hard to Do" Jennifer Heath Andrew D. Weyman February 18, 1992 516 Roseanne and Dan can finally relax now that Becky has broken up with Mark, but she can't help but fall back into his arms. 90-418 "This Old House" Michael Poryes Andrew D. Weyman February 25, 1992 518 Roseanne discovers that Darlene skipped school to attend a comic book convention in Chicago with David. Jackie and Roseanne return to their vacant childhood home and relive some memories, including ones about their abusive father. 91-419 "The Commercial Show" Chuck Lorre, Maxine Lapiduss Andrew D. Weyman March 3, 1992 519 The Conners are picked for a Rodbell's commercial, much to Darlene's embarrassment. Leon and his partner break up. DJ falls out with Todd, since his family is moving back to Chicago. 92-420 "Therapy" Joel Madison, Sid Youngers, Chuck Lorre Andrew D. Weyman March 17, 1992 520 Darlene is dead meat when she mouths off about a girl at school, and Roseanne accompanies Jackie to her therapist. 93-421 "Lies" Don Foster, Sid Youngers Andrew D. Weyman March 24, 1992 521 Darlene bypasses Roseanne about advice with David, Roseanne is anxious about a lie detector test in her workplace. 94-422 "Deliverance" Joel Madison, Chuck Lorre Gail Mancuso March 31, 1992 522 Crystal is 8 months pregnant and snapping at everyone in sight. When she goes into labor early, Dan has to help coach Crystal in the delivery room and she gives birth to a baby girl. Roseanne and Bonnie feud over who is going to manage the coffee shop, only to find out that the coffee shop is closing down in 3 weeks to become a bargain bin. Darlene tells David to quit crowding her. 95-423 "Secrets" Laurence H. Levy Andrew D. Weyman April 28, 1992 524 Mark is depressed because Becky still doesn't want to see him and he ends up getting drunk down at the Lobo Lounge. Dan has to lie about Mark's drunken state when he puts his fist through the Jukebox. 96-424 "Don't Make Me Over" Maxine Lapiduss and Sara Gilbert Andrew D. Weyman May 5, 1992 523 Becky and Darlene are bent on going to a rock concert, so they string some money together and give Roseanne a pampering at a spa. Roseanne sees a new side in her daughters for their kindness, but is upset to discover that they have an ulterior motive. 97-425 "Aliens" Joel Madison Andrew D. Weyman May 12, 1992 525 When Rodbell's luncheonette closes down and Dan's bike shop continues its slow descent, DJ competes in a spelling bee and wins, while Nancy is heartbroken over Arnie's decision to leave her. Nancy is also upset about his lame excuse: claiming he was abducted by aliens. Season 5 (1992−1993)
Order Title Writer(s) Director Original airdate Code 98-501 "Terms of Estrangement Part 1" Sy Dukane, Denise Moss Andrew D. Weyman September 15, 1992 601 With the bike shop failing, Roseanne and Dan must adjust to losing their money and seek new jobs. Meanwhile, Becky and Dan have a huge fight after Mark gets a great job offer in Minnesota. In the end, Becky runs away with Mark, and the two get married. 99-502 "Terms of Estrangement Part 2" Rob Ulin Andrew D. Weyman September 22, 1992 602 Becky returns home for her things, while Roseanne tries to accept Becky's marriage and tries to cheer up Dan after the loss of his bike shop. 100-503 "The Dark Ages" Eric Gilliland, Mike Gandolfi Andrew D. Weyman September 29, 1992 603 The Conners get their electricity cut off when they don't have enough money to pay their bill. Darlene gets in big trouble when she accidentally spends the night with David. She claims to have not slept with him, but her parents don't believe her. This episode concluded with a fourth wall breaking moment with Roseanne and Laurie Metcalf wrestling over a Emmy Award which Metcalf won that year. John Goodman eventually joined in before they all ran off stage and out a studio door accompanied by Tom Arnold. 101-504 "Mommy Nearest" Janice Jordan, Monica Piper Andrew D. Weyman October 6, 1992 605 Jackie is embarrassed when she starts going out with a much younger guy named Fisher. Bev makes a lot of money when she sells her house and wants to give much of it to her daughters, but only under one condition: they let her move to Lanford. 102-505 "Pretty in Black" Amy Sherman Andrew D. Weyman October 13, 1992 604 It's Darlene's 16th birthday and her parents enjoy torturing her by making her think they're giving her a sweet sixteen party. The Conners meet their new neighbors, Ty Tilden and his two daughters Charlotte and Molly. 103-506 "Looking for Loans in All the Wrong Places" Eileen Heisler,[4] DeAnn Heline[5] Andrew D. Weyman October 20, 1992 606 Roseanne decides to go into business with Jackie and Nancy by opening up a loose meat restaurant. When she can't get a loan at a bank she goes to her mother as a last resort. Bev agrees to put up another $10,000 but only if they let her become their 4th partner. 104-507 "Halloween IV" Rob Ulin Andrew D. Weyman October 27, 1992 607 With Becky gone, Roseanne does not get into the spirit of Halloween. She is visited by the Ghosts of Halloween Past, Present, and Future, illuminating her ever-present love of All Hallow's Eve-and the terrifying, Bev-like future that awaits if she does not change her ways! 105-508 "Ladies' Choice" Betsy Borns, David Raether Andrew D. Weyman November 10, 1992 608 Roseanne and Jackie are shocked to discover that Nancy is a lesbian. Roseanne starts to think she's getting old when her mom decides to move into a retirement community. 106-509 "Stand on Your Man" Denise Moss, Sy Dukane Andrew D. Weyman November 17, 1992 610 Roseanne is threatened at work, prompting the girls to sign up for a self-defense class. Arnie returns to take Nancy back, and learns about her lesbian lifestyle. 107-510 "Good Girls, Bad Girls" Amy Sherman-Palladino Andrew D. Weyman November 24, 1992 609 Darlene begs her mom to let her go to a rock concert with Molly when she shows up with an extra ticket. Roseanne reluctantly agrees but is fuming when Darlene doesn't come home until 4:00am. Darlene says that Molly ditched her to go smoke pot in some stranger's van and she had to take a cab home but her parents hesitate to believe her. 108-511 "Of Ice and Men" Robert Borden, Norm Macdonald Andrew D. Weyman December 1, 1992 611 Dan loves that DJ wants to be a hockey player but has a hard time teaching him. Fisher offers to help show DJ a few moves but then Jackie breaks up with him because she thinks it's inevitable that he going to dump her for a younger woman. Roseanne convinces her to get back together with him and she ends up moving in with him. 109-512 "No Place Like Home for the Holidays" Eric Gilliland Andrew D. Weyman December 15, 1992 612 Due to a snow storm, the Conners are forced to be apart for the holidays. Roseanne, Jackie, Bev, and Nana Mary are stuck at the Lunchbox. Dan, DJ, and Nancy are at the house and Darlene is at David's, and learns about his abusive home life. 110-513 "Crime and Punishment" Bruce Rasmussen Andrew D. Weyman January 5, 1993 613 DJ brings one of Darlene's comic books to school, and it is dubbed "obscene" by a teacher. When Darlene seeks DJ out for stealing her book, she walks in on Jackie in the bathroom-and her back is covered in bruises. Roseanne realizes that Fisher hit her, and Jackie breaks down. Upon hearing the news, Dan beats Fisher up, and winds up in jail. 111-514 "War and Peace" DeAnn Heline, Eileen Heisler Andrew D. Weyman January 12, 1993 614 Roseanne takes Jackie to the hospital, and Darlene bails Dan out of jail. The story of Dan's defending Jackie quickly spreads around town. Meanwhile, Fisher begs Jackie to come back to him. Roseanne is prepared to attack him herself-but learns that Jackie is strong enough to make her own decisions. 112-515 "Lanford Daze" Amy Sherman-Palladino Andrew D. Weyman January 26, 1993 615 Due to Darlene vandalizing the Lunch box, Roseanne forces her to serve loose meat sandwiches at the food fair, much to her chagrin. 113-516 "Wait Till Your Father Gets Home" Amy Sherman-Palladino Andrew D. Weyman February 9, 1993 616 Roseanne and Jackie are stunned to learn that their father has died, and both are reunited with his mistress at the funeral. 114-517 "First Cousin, Twice Removed" Janice Jordan Andrew D. Weyman February 16, 1993 617 Roseanne's obnoxious, wealthy cousin comes to town, hoping to end the feud that began years ago when she did not put Roseanne in her wedding party. While there, she tries to persuade Darlene to take her savings and follow her to New York. Roseanne and her cousin fight, but make up in the end. 115-518 "Lose a Job, Winnebago" Norm Macdonald Andrew D. Weyman February 23, 1993 618 The Conners go on a roadtrip with Molly's family for a taping of the Jackie Thomas show, while Dan tries to persuade Roseanne to have another child. 116-519 "It's a Boy!" Rob Ulin Andrew D. Weyman March 2, 1993 619 David's domestic life is reaching intolerable, so Darlene begs Roseanne for him to move in with them, Roseanne immediately refuses, but her mind soon changes when she catches a glimpse of his life herself. 117-520 "It was Twenty Years Ago Today" Betsy Borns Andrew D. Weyman March 9, 1993 620 During Roseanne and Dan's anniversary, Dan borrows Roseanne's wedding ring to remodel the design, her reaction is not at all what he intended. Roseanne poses for a sexy photograph for Dan. 118-521 "Playing with Matches" Robert Borden Andrew D. Weyman March 23, 1993 621 Roseanne plays cupid when she tries to set her mother up with a friend from the retirement home. Molly seduces David, which leads to a kiss, prompting Darlene to feud with him. 119-522 "Promises, Promises" Mike Gandolfi Andrew D. Weyman April 6, 1993 622 Darlene decides to go against her opinion of prom, and arrives with David, surprising him with a motel room after prom. Things at their motel room take a different turn, when neither are sure if they are ready for sex. 120-523 "Glengarry, Glen Rosey" Lois Bromfield, Scott Burton, Sy Dukane, Denise Moss Philip Charles MacKenzie May 4, 1993 623 Dan finishes remodeling a house, and is close to losing his own house. Luckily, Jackie saves the day and buys the house off the market. 121-524 "Tooth or Consequences" Leslie Reider Gail Mancuso May 11, 1993 624 Dan accidentally knocks out Roseanne's tooth on the day of the health inspector's visit. Darlene is faced with an ugly predicament: her boyfriend, or school in Chicago? 122-525 "Daughters and Other Strangers" Eric Gilliland Jeff Margolis May 18, 1993 625 Roseanne and Dan agree to let Darlene go to art school in Chicago, but what about David? DJ befriends an annoying boy on the block. Season 6 (1993−1994)
Order Title Writer(s) Director Original airdate Code 123-601 "Two Down, One to Go" Amy Sherman-Palladino Philip Charles MacKenzie September 14, 1993 701 Roseanne is heartbroken when Darlene refuses to drive to Chicago with her. In the hope that she will stay, David asks Darlene to marry him, leading to her refusal and a fight between them. Roseanne eventually goes to Darlene's Chicago apartment and stays the night, engaging in a mother-daughter talk. 124-602 "The Mommy's Curse" Eric Gilliland Philip Charles MacKenzie September 21, 1993 704 Roseanne has had her fill of Bev at the Lunchbox, and Bev agrees to leave, selling her share to Leon. Meanwhile, Jackie dives back into the dating arena, deciding to give Dan's friend Fred a go. 125-603 "Party Politics" Miriam Trogdon Philip Charles MacKenzie September 28, 1993 703 DJ begins skipping school. Roseanne is tired of Darlene and David's separation, so hosts a weekend for the two. When Darlene discovers that it was her mother's plan, she and DJ team up to plot revenge against her. Jackie refuses to go out on another date with Fred after their one night stand. 126-604 "A Stash from the Past" Kevin Abbott Philip Charles MacKenzie October 5, 1993 705 Roseanne is shocked to find a bag of pot in David's room, immediately punishing him for possession of the drugs. Dan realizes that the pot is a 20-year-old stash of his and Roseanne's. David, on the other hand, thinks it belongs to Darlene so he says that it is his to cover for her. Roseanne, Dan and Jackie roll one up for old times sake, and soon discover the zombifying effects of smoking pot. 127-605 "Be My Baby" Rick Ulin Philip Charles MacKenzie October 19, 1993 706 Roseanne has been trying to get pregnant for months now, but to no avail. Jackie drops a bombshell when she reveals she is pregnant after her one night stand with Fred, so Roseanne decides that she cannot steal Jackie's thunder by getting pregnant at the same time. 128-606 "Halloween V" Betsy Borns, Miriam Trogdon Gail Mancuso October 26, 1993 708 Nancy thinks that Dan doesn't like her, and Roseanne soon realizes she is right. Darlene and David scheme to terrify Roseanne on Halloween. 129-607 "Homeward Bound" Michael Borkow Philip Charles MacKenzie November 2, 1993 702 Darlene realizes how much David really misses her. Roseanne urges Dan to have a talk with DJ, who has discovered a puberty surprise; they believe he masturbates, and it is confirmed he does when Roseanne and Dan find a stash of magazines with pictures of women in them. 130-608 "Guilt by Imagination" Pat Bullard, Stevie Ray Fromstein Philip Charles MacKenzie November 9, 1993 707 Dan has lunch with Phyllis Zimmer, an old flame (mentioned in the 1st season episode "The Memory Game"), and has trouble trying to conceal it from Roseanne. Guest stars Vicki Lawrence (from Mama's Family and The Carol Burnett Show fame). 131-609 "Homecoming" Sid Youngers Gail Mancuso November 16, 1993 709 Becky and Mark return for Dan's 20th anniversary high school football team. Roseanne realizes that Becky and Mark are drifting further apart and schemes to break them up, only to learn that maybe Mark isn't the one to blame. Note: first episode with Sarah Chalke as Becky. 132-610 "Thanksgiving '93" Michael Borkow Philip Charles MacKenzie November 23, 1993 710 Nana Mary embarrasses a heavily-pregnant Jackie, and Bev reveals a secret about her marriage. Becky prepares the turkey dinner, while Dan and Mark battle it out. 133-611 "The Driver's Seat" James Berg, Stan Zimmerman Philip Charles MacKenzie November 30, 1993 711 Roseanne's suspicions that Leon is trying to usurp her position as head of the Lunchbox are cast aside by others when in fact, Leon really is trying to implement many changes to the restaurant behind her back. DJ steals Roseanne's car, and her violent response has her questioning who she really is, and if she is repeating her pattern of childhood abuse onto her kids. 134-612 "White Trash Christmas" Lawrence Broch, William Lucas Walker Philip Charles MacKenzie December 14, 1993 712 Due to a new limit of how decorated a house can be on the holidays, Roseanne and Dan go all out for Christmas. Roseanne is angry when Becky uses college money that was meant for her to put Mark through school and is further annoyed when Becky begins working at a tacky bar, "Bunz," inspired by the real-life bar, "Hooters." DJ finds out that David is living with Darlene and DJ tells her that he misses her. 135-613 "Suck Up or Shut Up" Betsy Borns, Mike Gandolfi Philip Charles MacKenzie January 4, 1994 713 Roseanne joins a women's club because Leon thinks it will be good for the diner. DJ hates having to be friends with the son of one of the women at the club (Florence Henderson) because he doesn't stop singing. Dan finds out that Mark has dropped out of trade school when he catches him at the bar. 136-614 "Busted" Amy Sherman-Palladino Philip Charles MacKenzie January 11, 1994 714 Mark breaks up with Becky because he doesn't think he's good enough for her and Becky is mad at Roseanne for making her push Mark to go to school. Roseanne finds out from Roy, Mark's roommate, (Ahmet Zappa) that David has been living with Darlene in Chicago and she tries to hide the fact from Dan. 137-615 "David vs. Goliath" Steve Pepoon Philip Charles MacKenzie February 1, 1994 716 After Roseanne went to Chicago to get David he starts to feel guilty about lying to Dan about living with Darlene. When Dan finds out he throws David out telling him to go back to his mom's. Roseanne intervenes and persuades Jackie to take him in. Becky tries to pressure Dan into hiring Mark again. Jackie refuses to accept money from Fred for the baby. 138-616 "Everyone Comes to Jackie's" Betsy Borns, Mike Gandolfi Philip Charles MacKenzie February 8, 1994 715 Dan has a hard time facing that he was lied to. Jackie's house is buzzing with activity as Roseanne tries to hide David from Dan. 139-617 "Don't Make Room for Daddy" Kevin Abbott, Stevie Ray Fromstein Philip Charles MacKenzie February 15, 1994 717 In the heat of anger, Dan tells Fred to fight for custody of the baby, so he agrees. Jackie is heartbroken when faced with the papers, and Dan tries to hide the fact that he is the one who suggested it. 140-618 "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" James Berg, Stan Zimmerman Philip Charles MacKenzie March 1, 1994 718 At a gay bar, Roseanne is the life of the party, until Nancy's girlfriend plants a kiss on her. One of Becky's old boyfriends gives Mark a reason to distrust her. 141-619 "Labor Day" Miriam Trogdon Philip Charles MacKenzie March 8, 1994 719 Roseanne is upset that Jackie wants Fred in the delivery room, not her. However, she is there when the contractions start, and doesn't contact Fred. Jackie delivers a baby boy, who she decides to name 'Andy'. 142-620 "Past Imperfect" David Raether Philip Charles MacKenzie March 22, 1994 720 When Dan's father misses an alimony payment he feels forced to give her money. Fred asks Jackie about her sexual history, which turns out to be more steamy than he imagined. 143-621 "Lies My Father Told Me" Eric Gilliland Philip Charles MacKenzie March 29, 1994 721 Roseanne tries to help Dan deal with life-changing news: his mother has a history of mental illness and psychiatric hospital stays. Ed allowed Dan to believe her imbalance was his fault all these years, due to his absence in Dan's life, in an effort to keep Dan's mother looking favorable in his eyes. Dan must come to terms with the idea that his father isn't the monster he always believed him to be. 144-622 "I Pray the Lord My Stove to Keep" Kevin Abbott, Pat Bullard Philip Charles MacKenzie May 3, 1994 722 DJ gives Roseanne a hard time about morals when she accepts a mistaken delivery of a stove, Darlene discovers that he has been lying about hanging out with his friend George to attend church. 145-623 "Body by Jake" David Forbes Philip Charles MacKenzie May 10, 1994 723 Bev breaks her pelvis while at the retirement home, saying she fell out of the shower. Roseanne discovers Bev broke her pelvis in a more lustful way. Fred pops the question to Jackie, just not the one she was hoping for. 146-624 "Isn't It Romantic?" Leif Sandaas, Cynthia Hogle, Timothy Schlattmann, Perry Dance Gail Mancuso May 17, 1994 724 Mark and David struggle with the concepts of feminism. Fred asks Roseanne about ways to propose to Jackie, and uses lines from her favorite soap opera. Roseanne demands passion from Dan, but turns to fantasy instead. 147-625 "Altar Egos" Rob Ulin, Eric Gilliland Mark K. Samuels May 24, 1994 725 Fred and Jackie are unsure whether to get hitched or not, especially since Fred thinks Jackie is having an affair with Dan. They break off the wedding, but after realizing he wasn't being realistic, Fred begs Jackie to marry him. At the ceremony, Jackie breastfeeds Andy at the Altar. Season 7 (1994−1995)
Order Title Writer(s) Director Original airdate Code 148-701 "Nine Is Enough" Stevie Ray Fromstein, Pat Bullard Gail Mancuso September 21, 1994 803 Dan is forced to shave his armpits to treat a cyst, and gets embarrassed when everyone finds out. Mark and Becky are given the boot, while Jackie and Fred conflict over the baby sharing their bed. Roseanne reveals that she is carrying her fourth child. 149-702 "Two for One" Stephen Godchaux Gail Mancuso September 28, 1994 801 When Jackie discovers Darlene at a motel in the middle of the day, she thinks she is lying about her and David's lovelife. Much to the family's horror, she was sleeping with Jimmy, a guy she met in college, subsequently breaking David's heart. 150-703 "Snoop Davey Dave" Elaine Aronson Gail Mancuso October 5, 1994 802 David lies about Darlene's prior drug usage in an effort to keep Darlene from returning to college and Jimmy. Roseanne keeps her under lock and key as Darlene tries to prove that she can be trusted and that David is just a lover scorned. 151-704 "Girl Talk" Miriam Trogdon Gail Mancuso October 12, 1994 804 Dan and his pals go too far talking about their lives in the bedroom, and soon become uncomfortable around each other. 152-705 "Sleeper" Tim Doyle Gail Mancuso October 19, 1994 806 David moves into DJ's room when the basement floods, and admits to Becky about having an erotic dream. Becky thinks the dream was about her, but to everyone's surprise, it was about Roseanne. 153-706 "Skeleton in the Closet" William Lucas Walker, Lawrence Broch Gail Mancuso October 26, 1994 807 Leon hosts a halloween party inviting all his gay friends, who seem to know Fred a little more than they should. Jackie and Roseanne become convinced that Bev wears a wig after seeing her stylist. 154-707 "Follow the Son" Dusty Kay Gail Mancuso November 2, 1994 809 DJ wants out of his busboy job at the Lunchbox, while David and Jimmy conflict over Darlene, who realizes that Jimmy thinks David likes him. 155-708 "Punch and Jimmy" David Raether Gail Mancuso November 9, 1994 805 Jackie and Roseanne make a surprise visit to Darlene's apartment to meet Jimmy. Dan tries to teach DJ self defense when a bully arises at school, and a frustrated DJ takes his anger out on an unexpecting David. 156-709 "White Men Can't Kiss" Rob Ulin, Kevin Abbott Gail Mancuso November 16, 1994 808 Roseanne makes a costume for DJ in the school play, but DJ drops the role when he finds out that he has to kiss a black girl. Several problems arise from his decision, forcing Dan and Roseanne to take a look at their views on race. 157-710 "Thanksgiving '94" Miriam Trogdon, Lois Bromfield Gail Mancuso November 23, 1994 810 Roseanne gets alarming news about her pregnancy that she can't confirm with the pre-natal clinic. Nana Mary arrives with a feeble husband on her arm, upsetting Bev by discussing the two abortions she had years ago. 158-711 "Maybe Baby" Matt Berry, Ed Yeager, Cynthia Mort Gail Mancuso November 30, 1994 811 Roseanne and Dan are anxious about the fate of her pregnancy, and DJ steps up to the plate and says he will help with any assistance that Roseanne needs, no matter what the result. The results are mistaken and are negative, but another fight arises at the celebration. 159-712 "The Parenting Trap" Sid Youngers Gail Mancuso December 14, 1994 812 Dan realizes DJ is having a puberty-related problem in school, and Mark gives a handy solution. Roseanne shares her growing up story with DJ about her first menstruation, which sends him running and screaming. 160-713 "Rear Window" Michael Borkow, Danny Zuker Gail Mancuso January 4, 1995 813 The new nudist couple next door tell the Conners that they are perverted for watching them, so they put up a hedge. David's time with Becky over coffee has Mark worried, so he enlists the help of Darlene. 161-714 "My Name is Bev" Bob Nickman Gail Mancuso January 11, 1995 814 After drunk-driving, Bev is forced to attend an AA meeting, where she realizes she is indeed an alcoholic. Dan throws a Super Bowl party at the house, where Bev shows up. Roseanne tells the guests to hide the keg, so Bev won't get tempted, which proves to be catastrophic. 162-715 "Bed and Bored" Eric Gilliland Gail Mancuso February 1, 1995 817 Roseanne lies about the doctor telling her she should stay in bed, and has everyone at her beck and call. David discovers that she is lying, and Jackie confronts Bev about her terrible mothering. 163-716 "Sisters" Michael Borkow Gail Mancuso February 8, 1995 815 Fred wants Jackie to get rid of DJ because he is getting on his nerves, so Jackie confronts Roseanne about it, trying to avoid a fight with Fred but walking into a fight with Roseanne. Dan also struggles with his two daughters over Roseanne's birthday. 164-717 "Lost Youth" Pat Bullard, Stevie Ray Fromstein Gail Mancuso February 15, 1995 818 David and Mark fight over a waitress at the Lunchbox named Stacy (Traci Lords), who David wants to draw a mural of. Jackie confronts Fred about their sex life, who says it is boring. 165-718 "Single Married Female" Betsy Borns Gail Mancuso February 22, 1995 819 In Roseanne's absence, Dan finds out that Jackie has been cheating on Fred when he catches her at the Lobo with another man. 166-719 "All About Rosey (Part 1)" Rob Ulin, Perry Dance Gail Mancuso March 1, 1995 816A Youngsters Roseanne and Jackie go to a fortune teller to take a look into the future. In the future, Jackie takes an adult, autistic DJ to a psychiatrist. 167-720 "All About Rosey (Part 2)" Perry Dance, Rob Ulin Gail Mancuso March 1, 1995 816B Sitcom moms begin to point the finger at Rosey about parenting, who is taught a thing or two about motherhood. 168-721 "Husbands and Wives" Kevin Abbott Gail Mancuso March 22, 1995 820 Roseanne gets DJ to help Darlene cut her own allowance. Jackie and Fred split, causing Roseanne to stick her nose in where it doesn't belong. 169-722 "Happy Trailers" Tim Doyle, Sid Youngers Mark K. Samuell March 29, 1995 821 Becky and Mark leave the nest to move into a tacky trailer park, and a tipsy neighbor (Sharon Stone) puts out the welcome mat. 170-723 "The Blaming of the Shrew" Lawrence Broch Gail Mancuso May 3, 1995 823 DJ is being bossed around by his new girlfriend (Ashley Johnson), who Roseanne actually begins to like, and his relationship causes problems at school. Jackie and Fred see a psychologist (Ellen DeGeneres) about their anger issues. 171-724 "The Birds and the Frozen Bees" David Forbes Gail Mancuso May 10, 1995 822 Roseanne thinks David likes someone more than Darlene, so the two reconcile after much poking and prodding about their reconciliation. 172-725 "Couch Potatoes" Eric Gilliland Mark K. Samuels May 17, 1995 825 The Conners are chosen as a Nielsen family. Roseanne's nesting instincts disrupt the family routine. Jackie and Fred's marriage has come to an end. 173-726 "Sherwood Schwartz: A Loving Tribute" William Lucas Walker, Allan Stephan Gail Mancuso May 24, 1995 824 Roseanne encourages Dan to return to working on the boat in the garage, while a Gilligan's Island fantasy plays into their heads in which the family are characters of the sitcom. Season 8 (1995−1996)
Order Title Writer(s) Director Original airdate Code 174-801 "Shower the People You Love with Stuff" Lawrence Broch Gail Mancuso September 19, 1995 901 Becky and Darlene feud over Roseanne's baby shower. 175-802 "Let Them Eat Junk" Matt Berry, Ed Yeager Gail Mancuso September 26, 1995 902 Jackie has a bee in her bonnet over Roseanne feeding Andy junkfood. Dan is upset since DJ's only perspective of him includes a can of beer. 176-803 "Roseanne in the Hood" Mike Costa, Drew Ogier Mark K. Samuels October 17, 1995 904 When a new, more classy restaurant opens opposite the Lunchbox, Roseanne declares war. 177-804 "The Last Date" Eric Gilliland, Daniel Palladino Gail Mancuso October 24, 1995 905 The temptation to crash a stranger's bar mitzvah at a local hotel is too much for Roseanne as she drags Dan out on the town for a "last hurrah" before the baby is born. 178-805 "Halloween: the Final Chapter" Roseanne, Lois Bromfield Roseanne October 31, 1995 906 Roseanne reigns as "Queen of the Gypsies, consort of wizards and seer of souls" on Halloween a Ouija board sends a message from "The Dead" and portends an unexpected event: she has the baby, who she names "Jerry". 179-806 "The Fifties Show" Allan Stephan Gail Mancuso November 7, 1995 907 The Conners find themselves going back in time in this spoof of 1950s sitcoms (shot mostly in black and white): Roseanne's a fussy hausfrau, Dan is a hapless businessman stewing over "the Anderson account", and Jackie's the wacky neighbor. 180-807 "The Getaway, Almost" Cynthia Mort Gail Mancuso November 14, 1995 908 Jackie and Roseanne's shopping trip with Jerry turns into a version of Thelma and Louise when they accept a lift from a teen and run a trucker off the road. 181-808 "The Last Thursday in November" Ritch Shydner Gail Mancuso November 21, 1995 909 When DJ's teacher gives his students free rein, the class Thanksgiving pageant takes on a decidedly modern, Pulp Fiction twist – and offends many of the parents, but not the Conners. Roseanne invites some new Native American friends over for their Thanksgiving celebration, and they do it their way. 182-809 "Of Mice and Dan" Bob Nickman Gail Mancuso November 28, 1995 910 Dan's old band mates (guest star John Popper) roll on into Lanford to play, and Dan gets a dose of regret, infused with a tad of depression. Roseanne talks to the band, and gets Dan a little stage time, which he takes full advantage of. 183-810 "Direct to Video" Michael B. Kaplan Gail Mancuso December 5, 1995 903 While Roseanne narrates a video time capsule for her unborn child, Becky and Darlene find old love letters of Dan and Roseanne's. DJ gets upset when he finds his parents did not fill out his baby book, and Mark cooks a 'special' dinner for the Conner clan. 184-811 "December Bride" William Lucas Walker Gail Mancuso December 12, 1995 911 Scott and Leon are having their gay wedding, but have trouble with the plans until Roseanne offers to plan it for free. Meanwhile, Leon has cold feet and he thinks he's not gay, until the truth be told by Roseanne. 185-812 "The Thrilla Near the Vanilla Extract" Ed Yeager Gail Mancuso January 2, 1996 912 Jackie realizes her hidden talent as a samplesperson as she and Roseanne take jobs at a grocery store. Meanwhile, Dan and David fight about Mark being DJ's role model. 186-813 "The White Sheep of the Family" David Raether Gail Mancuso January 9, 1996 913 After the Conners receive a small inheritance from their great Aunt Harriet, they decide to all go out to a nice dinner, with their limits already set, until Darlene unexpectedly pops in. Meanwhile, DJ is contemplating what to spend his own personal inheritance from great aunt Harriet on, since he received $500. Darlene spends her visit home alienating the family and hurling insults, until the family finally bites back. DJ buys a trombone. 187-814 "Becky Howser, M.D." Sid Youngers Gail Mancuso January 16, 1996 914 Mark tries to help a depressed Becky, by inviting the friends and family over for a surprise get together. That is his way of cheering her up. Roseanne talks to her at the party, as everything is going wrong, and she admits that she wants more out of life. Roseanne supports that decision, unaware that Becky's plans for change include her marital status. 188-815 "Out of the Past" Drew Ogier, Mike Costa Gail Mancuso February 6, 1996 915 While Nana Mary amuses Roseanne and Jackie with a box of their childhood treasures, they take a walk down memory lane, & discover that Roseanne has always been the queen, to Jackie's minion status. Jackie finds her long lost doll, "Mrs. Tuttle" that she thought had been 'doll-napped', Roseanne tries to pin the disappearance on a napping Nana Mary. The truth is told though, when Nana Mary calls Roseanne on her story... 189-816 "Construction Junction" Daniel Palladino Gail Mancuso February 13, 1996 916 When Dan's buddies show up with a great new job prospect for the old crew, Dan is confused as to what to do. Should he continue on at the garage, or make a bid on a huge construction job, that would make him & his friends a lot of money? Meanwhile, Jackie gets hooked up to the internet, and reluctantly starts to surf. Ultimately, David needs to intervene to pry her away from the screen. 190-817 "We're Going to Disney World" Matt Berry Gail Mancuso February 20, 1996 917 The family goes hog wild with excitement and with plans to travel to Disney World when Dan brings home his final paycheck from the Lanford City Garage. 191-818 "Disney World War II" Allan Stephan Gail Mancuso February 27, 1996 918 Fireworks and fanfare accompany the Conners on a whirlwind tour of the magical kingdom of Disney World, when Darlene finds she's actually happy in the presence of Winnie the Pooh. 192-819 "Springtime for David" Garland Testa, David Forbes Mark K. Samuels March 12, 1996 919 After Dan's strict order of David having to move out, he finally does and works at a not-well-known theme park in Lanford, and David also transforms into a different person with an eerie smile. 193-820 "Another Mouth to Shut Up" Janet Leahy, Richard Kaplan Mark K. Samuels March 26, 1996 920 Just weeks after their hot night in Disney World, Darlene proposes to David and has a surprise announcement: she's pregnant. 194-821 "Morning Becomes Obnoxious" Leif Sandaas Gail Mancuso April 9, 1996 921 After an impromptu interview at the diner goes spectacularly well, Roseanne prepares to "Wake Up Chicago" on a morning TV talk show (with Jackie as her manager) with a news commentator who has a unique and "opinionated blue-collar outlook". Meanwhile, David plans for the wedding, but offends Bev as well. 195-822 "Ballroom Blitz" Cathy Ladman, Carrie Snow Gail Mancuso April 30, 1996 922 Bev's smitten with her passionate ballroom-dance instructor until drama unfolds on the dance floor when he starts flirting with the newly-divorced Jackie. When Jackie agrees to have dinner with him, the claws come out from Bev! 196-823 "The Wedding" Michael B. Kaplan, Lawrence Broch Gail Mancuso May 7, 1996 923 Darlene's wedding with David is held and it immediately turns into disaster when Dan has a heart attack during the reception. 197-824 "Heart & Soul" Daniel Palladino, William Lucas Walker Gail Mancuso May 14, 1996 924 Roseanne tries to be cool at the hospital, but she really can't. We learn that DJ performed CPR on Dan to keep him alive. A small replica of the reception is held in Dan's hospital room. 198-825 "Fights and Stuff" Cynthia Mort, Sid Youngers Mark K. Samuels May 21, 1996 925 Dan returns home to a now strict diet regime and other rules. Dan doesn't follow the rules behind Roseanne's back, and it leads to a huge uproar and a fight that leaves the Conner house broken apart. The argument is ironically similar to the fight they had in the first episode. Season 9 (1996−1997)
Order Title Writer(s) Director Original airdate Code 199-901 "Call Waiting" Drew Ogier, Allan Stephan Mark K. Samuels September 17, 1996 1001 Dan begins to regret what he had said to Roseanne, as well as the rules he broke. Dan fixes the house after the huge fight, and leaves a ton of messages on Jackie's answering machine. Roseanne finds herself in front of Jackie's TV, watching noticeable past sitcoms, such as That Girl, I Dream of Jeannie, and The Mary Tyler Moore Show, eventually finding her and Dan playing the roles of Ann & Don, Mary and Lou Grant, and Jeannie and Tony. Later, Jackie convinces Roseanne that Dan and Roseanne were meant for each other. Cameo appearance by Ed Asner. 200-902 "Millions from Heaven" Nancy Steen, Cynthia Mort Mark K. Samuels September 24, 1996 1002 Remember the lottery ticket mentioned in the last episode? It's a winner! Roseanne finds out that she has won $108 million dollars. The family ponders over what they will do with all that money, and they are bombarded by press and local news. 201-903 "What a Day for a Daydream" Richard Kaplan, Garland Testa Mark K. Samuels October 1, 1996 1003 With a full dinner table and a home-cooked meal, Roseanne daydreams about the lottery winnings; from a riot on the Jerry Springer Show, to a glamorous photo shoot with Jackie and Hugh Hefner. 202-904 "Honor Thy Mother" Bob Nickman, Amy Welsh Mark K. Samuels October 8, 1996 1004 Dan drops an announcement! That he's going to visit his mother in California, which surprises Roseanne, who is caught off guard. The Conner house begins the renovation process, while Jackie and Roseanne prepare to be pampered in a spa. 203-905 "Someday My Prince Will Come" Carrie Snow, Janet Leahy Mark K. Samuels October 15, 1996 1005 Prince Carlos Chermaine (Jim Varney), comes to visit Jackie after he's fallen in love with her after seeing her on television. Roseanne warns Jackie to remain distant, as she finds him to be a phony, until Leon discovers that he's really a prince. The family as well as Leon are invited to a trip to New York, except for Dan, who's off in California. 204-906 "Pampered to a Pulp" Stacie Lipp Mark K. Samuels October 22, 1996 1007 Roseanne and Jackie's supposed 'impromptu' spa trip turns out to be chaotic, especially when they are on a strict diet, acid peels, skin toxins, and exhausting hikes.
NOTE: Roseanne (Roseanne) and Laurie Metcalf (Jackie) are the only main cast to appear in this episode.205-907 "Satan, Darling" Roseanne Barr, Jennifer Saunders Roseanne Barr October 29, 1996 1006 Roseanne, Jackie, and Nancy go to the Upper West Side in New York City after being invited there. They meet famous celebrities, and are also given an invite to Martha's Vineyard by a woman named Astrid Wentworth. After becoming drunk with Edina Monsoon (Jennifer Saunders) and Patsy Stone (Joanna Lumley), Roseanne, in a parody of Rosemary's Baby, has a nightmare of Darlene giving birth to Satan. 206-908 "Hoi Polloi Meets Hoiti Toiti" Leif Sandaas, Debbie Kasper Mark K. Samuels November 12, 1996 1008 Roseanne, Jackie, DJ, Mark, Bev, Becky, Andy, and Jerry go to the Wentworth estate to meet Astrid's family – who aren't impressed at Roseanne's trashy ways. Roseanne backfires at them over the findings of the family's stash of happy pills, until Roseanne teaches the family to scream out their anger. 207-909 "Roseambo" R. Gaylor, Betsy Salkind Gary Halvorson November 19, 1996 1009 Roseanne meets First Lady, Hillary Clinton (Teresa Barnwell), after saving her family and Dr. Bakshmi from women-hating terrorists on a train en route to Washington D.C. 208-910 "Home is Where the Afghan Is" Lawrence Broch Gary Halvorson November 26, 1996 1010 Roseanne and Jackie as well as the family finally arrive home from all the excitement! Roseanne, who thought that Dan would be home before they arrived, is completely wrong. Her Thanksgiving is being catered, and she decides as well as Jackie to open the Lunch Box as a soup kitchen. Bev reveals more than she intended during Thanksgiving Dinner. 209-911 "Mothers and Other Strangers" Roseanne Barr, Cynthia Mort Gary Halvorson December 3, 1996 1011 Dan still isn't home, and Roseanne is afraid of the changes to the family, and the house, that she has made. Elsewhere, Bev goes seeking answers from her free-spirited mother, Mary, who finally mends her relationship with her daughter. 210-912 "Home for the Holidays" Lawrence Broch Mark K. Samuels December 17, 1996 1012 Dan comes home from California for the holidays, and the family is happy. Dan is distant from Roseanne, and Jackie catches him on the phone flirting with his mother's nurse. 211-913 "Say It Ain't So" Nancy Steen Mark K. Samuels January 7, 1997 1013 Jackie catches Dan on the phone with his mother Audrey's nurse, whom he had an affair with. Roseanne kicks Dan out in the process, and she is devastated over the decision she has made. 212-914 "Hit the Road, Jack" Roseanne Barr Mark K. Samuels January 14, 1997 1014 Roseanne ignores Dan and drives around town eating fast food and listening to radio shows. She thinks Dan had an affair because of her appearance. As Dan packs his bags to leave, he and DJ have a huge fight. In the heat of anger, DJ goes to a video store and meets his soul mate, Heather (Heather Matarazzo). Dan leaves the house to head back to California, but at the last moment he cancels his flight and moves into a motel close to the airport. 213-915 "The War Room" Bob Nickman Mark K. Samuels January 28, 1997 1015 A depressed Roseanne locks herself and Jerry into her bedroom with fatty foods, trashy magazines, and TV. Friends and family attempt to get her out, but they all ultimately fail to do so, except Mark, who tells her that Dan still hasn't left town wants her to come back to him. 214-916 "Lanford's Elite (1)" Richard Whitley, Bob Rubin Gary Halvorson February 11, 1997 1016 Roseanne and Jackie go off to an exquisite luncheon where they discuss politics and other topics with the rich and famous of Lanford, or in other words, the elite. Meanwhile, Roseanne meets Edgar Wellman, the son of the owner of Wellman's Plastic where Roseanne and Jackie worked. Edgar asks Roseanne for money to help keep the plastics factory open, which entered decline after Roseanne and Jackie left in 1989. 215-917 "Some Enchanted Merger (2)" April Winchell Gary Halvorson February 11, 1997 1017 Jackie believes that Roseanne and Edgar Wellman are real, which isn't true, despite the fact Roseanne desperately wants him, but she hides it. Roseanne tells Jackie that it's just for business, but she doesn't believe her. Roseanne dreams that Edgar and herself are from the movie, Evita. 216-918 "A Second Chance" Cynthia Mort Mark K. Samuels February 18, 1997 1018 Dan, who is reluctant to leave, asks Jackie about Edgar Wellman's relationship with Roseanne. Jackie confirms. Roseanne, however, comes back to Dan. As they reconcile, they receive a call from Jackie that Darlene is in labor and they have given her a drug to stop her from delivering a premature baby. 217-919 "The Miracle" Drew Ogier Gary Halvorson February 25, 1997 1019 Everyone is scared when Darlene gives birth to a premature baby, Harris Conner Healy, a girl, who might die. Roseanne consults other doctors from around the world, but proves to be unhelpful. Roseanne, herself, keeps the baby alive with love and affection. 218-920 "Roseanne-Feld" April Winchell, Richard Whitley Mark K. Samuels March 4, 1997 1020 Jackie and Mark go off to a wrestling match, but Jackie's nightmare happens when she must fight the Black Widow. DJ comes in close contact with his first sexual experience, and consults Mark for help, but Mark turns out to be unhelpful. 219-921 "The Truth Be Told" Lawrence Broch, April Winchell Mark K. Samuels March 18, 1997 1021 Roseanne and Jackie learn that producers want to create a TV movie about the Conners, but also find out that the producers wanted to make drastic changes including gorgeous actors to play the Conners and plot twists to make the story less blue-collar, which distresses Roseanne and Jackie. Meanwhile, a tabloid reporter pays a call on Bev, Joyce and Leon, and they naively reveal a wealth of information about Roseanne’s life and past. 220-922 "Arsenic and Old Mom" Carrie Fisher Mark K. Samuels May 13, 1997 1022 Audrey (Debbie Reynolds), Dan's crazy mom, stops by for a surprise visit. Audrey tries in numerous ways to kill her son for putting her away for so many years. Roseanne begins to realize this of Audrey, and decides to end it all with a simple battle in the backyard. 221-923 "Into That Good Night (Part 1)" Jessica Pentland, Jennifer Pentland Gary Halvorson May 20, 1997 1023 Harris Conner Healy, the prematurely born daughter of David and Darlene, finally arrives at home after a brush with death. Darlene decides to stay at the house for a while, to help hone her parenting skills under Roseanne's direction. Roseanne is delighted and wants Darlene to stay forever. DJ begrudgingly gives up his room, and heads for the basement, taking David's former space now to make room for the baby. It is revealed that Mark & Becky are expecting as well as Mark and Becky spend time with Harris. Mark wants to spread the news, but Becky opts to hold off, and let the day be about Darlene. Darlene is apprehensive about overstaying their welcome, so she questions Roseanne about it. Roseanne lets her know that she would like them to live with her at the house forever. Darlene is relieved, and would like that as well. Leon and his significant other announce they will be adopting little Nadia, a little girl that needs a family. 222-924 "Into That Good Night (Part 2)" Roseanne Barr, Allan Stephan Gary Halvorson May 20, 1997 1024 In the first half, the family talks about life after winning the lottery. In the last 15 minutes Roseanne reflects about her fictional life as it is revealed to the audience through a voiceover monologue that the show itself has really been her writing. She says that while the book she was writing was based on her life, she changed what she didn't like. For instance, in reality, the Conners did not win the lottery, Dan died of the heart attack, Jackie was gay instead of Bev, and Mark and Darlene were a couple and Becky and David were a couple, instead of the other way around. In the final moments, after looking over her book, she goes upstairs and sits on the couch. The show fades to black and her trademark laugh is heard one last time.
In 2011, the two-part finale was ranked #9 on the TV Guide Network special, TV's Most Unforgettable Finales.[6]References
Categories:- Lists of American television series episodes
- Lists of sitcom television series episodes
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