- List of Ned's Declassified School Survival Guide characters
This is a list of fictional characters from the television series Ned's Declassified School Survival Guide.
Ned Bigby Ned's Declassified School Survival Guide character < --> Created by Scott Fellows Portrayed by Devon Werkheiser Information Nickname(s) Bigby, Wheels, Wedgepicker, Nedcompoop, Big Bee, Psycho Aliases Den Ybgib, Nerd Bigby, The Revenger Gender Male Occupation Student Family Mrs. Bigby (mother)
Ned Bigby (Devon Werkheiser) Ned is the main character and the main protagonist who created the guide after walking into the girls bathroom in kindergarten, where it is revealed that he couldn't see well, and has walked into the girls bathroom at least six times. He is usually getting into trouble with his friends Moze and Cookie. Ned is a pretty smart boy, but he's also very lazy; most of the time he gets scores lower than the average (although he's perfectly capable to get straight A's when he works seriously) and tries to find the easiest way (not necessarily the right or logical way) to solve any personal problem. Because of this, his plans usually backfire, but teach him lessons that result in the tips of his School Survival Guide. Ned has been neighbors with Moze his whole life. His dream girl is Suzie Crabgrass and has been since they were eight years old. In the series finale though, Ned and Moze, end up dating. His dream girl has to be funny, have a good smile and attitude. He usually turns to Gordy, the school's janitor, for advice. He was in all 55 episodes.
- Lisa Zemo
- Martin Qwerly
- Coconut Head
- Suzie Crabgrass
- BackPack Boy
- Claire Sawyer Future Lawyer
- Seth Powers
- Albert Wormheimer
- Martin Qwerly (Season 1)
- BackPack Boy (Season 2)
- Coconut Head (Season 2)
- Billy Loomer (Season 3)
Jennifer 'Moze' Mosely Ned's Declassified School Survival Guide character Created by Scott Fellows Portrayed by Lindsey Shaw Information Nickname(s) Moze Gender Female Occupation Student
Jennifer "Moze" Mosely (Lindsey Shaw) is the deuteragonist of the show and Ned's attractive best friend. Jennifer goes by the name of "Moze" because Ned called her that in first grade to avoid confusion from the other three Jennifers in the class. Moze tends to be good at everything she does. She tries to break away from Ned and Cookie in the hope of finding a girl to be friends with and eventually became best friends with her ex-enemy, Suzie Crabgrass. She is a volleyball jock and has set the most school records, including one for the most school records. She is very talented in wood-shop class. She is also usually the one Ned and Cookie come to for favors. Her favorite color is red, she has a swimming pool at her house, and her best friends are Ned, Cookie,and Gordy. She was on Mr Sweeney's "Listen To" list until the episode "The New Kid and Substitute Teachers." She was in all 55 episodes. She is hinted to be falling in love with Ned as they both have kissed 5 times, First in a dance at the school, Second on the bus the next day, Third at a party, Fourth in the halls of the school & Fifth on a school field trip.
- Coconut Head
- Mr. Chopsaw
- Mr. Wright
- Ned Bigby (Season 3)
- Faymen Phorchin (Season 3)
- Jock Goldman (Season 2)
- Seth Powers (Season 1-3)
- Billy Loomer (Season 1-3)
Note: Although she never dated Billy Loomer, he has had a crush on her since the first season.
Simon Nelson 'Cookie' Cook Ned's Declassified School Survival Guide character Created by Scott Fellows Portrayed by Daniel Curtis Lee Information Nickname(s) Cookie Aliases Symone and P-Cookie Gender Male Occupation Student Family Mr. Nelson-Cook (father)
Mrs. Nelson-Cook (mother)
Simon Nelson "Cookie" Cook (Daniel Curtis Lee) Simon goes by the name of Cookie, since his last name is Cook. He is the tritagonist of the show. He is a cybernerd and is usually in some kind of crisis. He often uses his knowledge with technology to help himself and his friends. He has a motherboard in his locker, his pants double as a printer, and his glasses double as a computer display. Even though he didn't like her in the first and second season, he falls for Lisa Zemo who had a complete makeover in 8th grade. In some episodes in the 8th grade adventures, he tries to get her to go out for pizza with him, which never works because she has lots of guys to date until the last episode. At the end of the series he finally gets to take Lisa out on a date. He is shown to be the mostly unlucky character in the series, usually being harmed or giving wrong, even when his plans worked perfectly. He won the school spelling bee. His friends are Ned, Moze, and Gordy. He, too, was in all 55 episodes of the series.
- Coconut Head
- Lisa Zemo (Season 3)
- Evelyn Kwong (Season 3)
- Vanessa (Season 2)
Gordon "Gordy" (Daran Norris) The 40 year-old janitor at Polk who never does his job, although the school is normally not visibly dirty. He is usually very crazy about capturing a weasel that lives in the school and helping Ned, Cookie, and Moze with crazy activities. If there is a big mess to clean up, Gordy always gives the excuse "Eh, I'll let the night guy get it". As the janitor for James Polk Middle School he has won the hearts of students and faculty because of knowing that the kids come first. He was once a dance instructor, and was voted "most likely to amount to nothing" when he attended Polk. He was also class clown. Episodes = 44
Mr. Monroe (Jim J. Bullock) Mr. Monroe is the Life Science teacher, as well as being in charge of the Sewing Club. He is also the extremely skilled boys' basketball coach. Mr. Monroe appears mostly in the first and second season, but returns in "Guide to: School Newspaper". He had apparently been "living with the penguins" for a year, which explains his absence for a large portion of season 3.
Susan "Suzie" Crabgrass (Christian Serratos) Ned's crush and Moze's rival at every sport, but later best friend. Suzie was not interested in Ned from Seasons 1-2. Having ended up dating Billy Loomer for a short time at the beginning of Season 2. But in Season 3, she has a crush on him, and they started dating in the episode Popularity. She left in season 3 but She came back in Guide to: Tests and When You Like Someone That Is Going Out With Someone Else. She was Ned's dream girl since the age of eight. In the series finale she was hoping that she and Ned will be together but decides to date Loomer after seeing his brand-new change.
Missy Meany - (Carlie Casey)- A conceited girl who is pretty and very popular. Missy is a school cheerleader. However, she turns out to be a nasty person who cheats at most anything and will stop at nothing to get her way. She has an obsessive crush on Ned. In the episode "Art" she is seen picking her nose. After noting that Ned will not return the feelings for her, she later goes out with Crony. She is a Gemini. She also has two bodyguards, who she cheerfully calls her collection team or "Missy Buddies".
Billy Loomer (Kyle Swann) The leader of a trio of bullies at Polk Middle School and the show's main antagonist. He and his bully friends enjoy picking on kids, especially Ned, Cookie, and Coconut-Head. He has a big crush on Moze. He wants to break up with Suzie so he can date Moze. He even has a crush on Cookie's alter ego Simone. At the end of the series he changes from a violent bully into a kind, respectable, well-mannered, young man. He is an Aries. His name is a parody of Billy Loomis, A character who's the Boyfriend of Sidney Prescott and one of the Ghostface Killers from the film Scream.
Jerry Crony (Matthew "Teo" Olivares) One of Loomer's friends, who aids him in bullying, with a penchant for fashion design and often tries to deny the fact every time he is seen sewing. He tries to ask Missy out a few times in the series but always fails due to his hair and clothes.
Buzz Rodriguez (Recci Canon) One of Loomer's friends, who aids him in bullying, but doesn't talk much. Loomer even says he hasn't said anything the entire time since Crony and himself have known him. The reason for this, as said by Buzz in the episode "Volunteering", is that everything has been fine and he has never had a reason to talk up to that episode.
The Huge Crew
The Huge Crew A girl group of bullies in the school led by Doris Trembley. They strongly dislike Billy Loomer and his friends, and they are insanely obsessed with Ned.
Bitsy Johnson (Spencer Locke) A popular and mean girl (seen only in Season 1) who cheats to get high grades and academic awards at school, Moze being her main victim, as revealed on the episode 'Cheaters and Bullies'. She also even tried to humiliate Moze by stealing her diary, and in the episode Notes she got Ned in trouble passing notes. She only hates Ned & Moze, but does like Cookie. She does not appear in Season 2 because she was possibly expelled by threatening Ned & Moze and her character was replaced by Missy.
Seth Powers (Alex Black) - The clueless and basketball loving boy of Moze's dreams in the seasons 1 and 2, who suddenly became smart after going out with Evelyn Kwong. He is usually seen spinning a basketball (which he shows to value more than girls) on his finger and making up bad rhymes. In the episode "Secrets" it is shown he may have dyslexia. He is also known to spell basketball with one l.
Coconut Head (Rob Pinkston) A geeky friend of Ned, Moze, and Cookie. No viewer knows his real name and nobody in school can remember his first name because they never say his real name. His nickname is based on his hairdo, which his mom gave him, which looks like a coconut. He gets chronic nose bleeds, and has been getting them ever since he was three. It's revealed that he has a very talented, operatic singing voice in the episode Electives. In the episode Valentine's Day, he is in love with the Huge Crew.
Martin Qwerly (Tylor Chase) Another geeky friend of Ned, Cookie, and Moze. He is extremely optimistic and is always seen talking, usually insanely fast. He is also known to be "super-duper positive" and is Le-Forger, as hinted. People usually cover his mouth during his fast talks or put up a cardboard cutout of themselves next to him and leave. But he eventually stops this habit by season 3. He is the Class Vice-President. In the episode Video Projects he is shown pretending to be a ninja and is caught on video, causing him to become a laughingstock until Ned and Cookie added special effects into the video, making him popular. His name is a pun of the phrase "smart and squirrelly" as seen in the episode "Guide to: Project Partners".
Le-Forger (Tylor Chase) Le-Forger occurred only once in the series in the episode "Notes". Le-Forger is the best note forger in James Polk Middle since it shows him eating a macaroon that his locker is full to capacity with.
Claire Sawyer (Brooke Marie Bridges) The "future lawyer" of the school, who represents students at Polk. She seems to pop up whenever somebody says the word lawyer. Claire's catchphrase is "Claire Sawyer, future lawyer," and hands the person a card. Ned, Cookie, and Moze always exclaim that they have known her since pre-kindergarten.
Lisa Zemo (Rachel Sibner) A geeky and good-natured friend of Ned, Cookie and Moze who undergoes a complete makeover in Season 3 of the show. She is allergic to many things, including cats, dogs, nuts, and rap videos that exploit women. Because of her chronic allergies (in Seasons 1-2), she is almost always seen carrying and obsessively using a bottle of nasal spray. She had a crush on Cookie who found her creepy before her makeover and vies for her attention after it, competing with several geeky boys. In the episode "Dismissal", Cookie is seen asking himself, "Why won't Lisa chase me like she used to?" She is the Class Treasurer.
Coach Joy Dirga
Coach Joy Dirga A tough and aggressive female coach/gym teacher who is often seen shouting harshly at her students. A typical example of the "Sergeant Coach" character trope. Despite her aggressive nature and tendency to be like a drill sergeant, she has a caring and encouraging side. She enjoys Star Wars and soap operas.
Mr. Sweeney - (Don Creech) The "evil" science teacher, who seemed to especially dislike Ned towards the beginning of the series (a feeling that Ned returned throughout much of the series). Mr. Sweeney is often shown as the episode's antagonist, but in some cases is just trying to either teach Ned, Cookie, and Moze a lesson or help them achieve. In the series finale, as an "Early graduation gift", he helps Ned hide from Vice-Principal Crubbs by telling Crubbs he has not seen Ned. After Mr. Crubbs leaves, Mr. Sweeney says to Ned that he was one of his worst students, but also one of his favorites, and walks away. In the episode "Guide To: School Websites", it is revealed via webcam that he picks his nose in private. Mr. Sweeney is always seen wearing a white lab coat. His name is most likely a pun referring to Sweeney Todd.
Spencer (Corbin Bleu) A student at Polk who is very good at acting. He speaks with a projected theatre voice and dreams of being a Hollywood star. In the episode "School Plays", Suzie and Spencer play as Romeo & Juliet, and Spencer makes Ned jealous by saying that the big kiss will win Suzie over. In another episode "Revenge", Backpack Boy got revenge on Spencer for stealing his crush, Claire Sawyer. He only appeared twice because the actor Corbin Bleu was busy filming High School Musical 2.
iTeacher (Mo Collins) The English teacher who "home teaches" using a Webcam to display her head on a computer screen. She appeared in Season 3 and appears on an iMac G4 using the school's wireless chat server. A student usually wheels her around on a cart when she wants to speak to a particular person. She has said a few times that she lives in a box. Originally, iTeacher was supposed to be a hologram.
- According to Moze; The class thought in the first episode of season 3 that she was only a head. She is in the Season 3 theme song.
Principal Pal (John Bliss) The senile former principal of the school. He becomes the new socials studies teacher when Miss Knap resigns. He once had a dream to go roller-blading in Africa, which he wanted to do when he quit. It is revealed in, "Guide to: Halloween" that he has no pulse, and a plate in his chest that makes it so his heartbeat cannot be heard, two things he used to convince Ned and friends that he was dead to scare them.
Principal Alistar Wright
Principal Alistar Wright (Meshach Taylor) A Social Studies teacher at Polk who favors Moze as one of his best students. He later becomes the principal in Season 3. He is also the school's cross country coach. He appears as the Social Studies teacher in Seasons 1 & 2. He grew a beard in Season 2. It is once revealed that he has his doctorate degree from Harvard University.
Faymen Phorchin (Vinicius Machado) Moze's crush, and later boyfriend in the third season until the episode When You Like Someone Who Is Going Out With Someone Else, where he leaves to play Pro Soccer in Brazil. His name is a pun on the words "Fame and Fortune". When he kisses Moze, Moze feels nothing and says there is no spark, unlike Moze's kiss with Ned. In Season 3, episode 8 (Guide To: Bus and Bad Hair Days) the Spanish Teacher talks to Faymen in Spanish and he answers back in Portuguese saying that he misses his home in Brazil.
Vice Principal Harvey Crubbs
Vice Principal Harvey Crubbs (Hamilton Mitchell) The Vice Principal and exaggerated character spoof of Miami Vice. Crubbs is always keeping an eye on Ned. He is obsessed with flamingos, mini powdered donuts, and sunglasses. He states to Ned in "Guide to: Career Day" that he didn't want to be a vice-principal as a teenager, but rather wanted to be a vice-cop in Miami. He took the job as vice-principal as a way to help the kids at school stop themselves from getting to bad places (And because it still has vice in the title).
He has two catchphrases. One is "Crubbs OUT!", which he will say when he leaves. He is also known to tell people to do something, or "You're fired!", usually said to Gordy, although he never actually means it. This second phrase is a play on Donald Trump's infamous catchphrase, "You're fired."
He also tried to trick all the people who were wanting an interview for Principal until Principal Pal knocked him out and put him in the trap room. Principal Wright then managed to be principal. In Lost and Found, he was discovered to steal things from the lost and found and put them in a special room to keep.
He is also known to tell someone that he will be watching them "Like this". This is followed by him putting his sunglasses on in a strange way. For example, he once said "I'm watching you, like this..." He takes his glasses and turns them crooked on his face. He continues, "Or this" and covers only one eye with the glasses. Finally, he finishes with "And maybe even this". He then wears his glasses normally, and holds up a fist that holds another pair of sunglasses in such a way that his fist resembles a face.
Although he can be severe, crazy and egotistical at times, Crubbs proves to be a very fair person, having no intent in getting anyone into trouble; he is simply strict and takes rules very seriously. These characteristics make Crubbs both a hero and a villain in the series. He isn't really evil he is just trying to help students find the right path in life instead of taking a wrong path such as a Mugger.
Dr. Xavier (Lusia Strus) The Grade 8 Math teacher. She is a self-proclaimed "super-genius" who tends to be quite strict and almost maniacal. She is always seen wearing a drab gray smock, and at one point required all her students to dress the same. Her students, including Cookie, seemed to fear her in the Math episode due to her overly harsh attitude; but when Cookie suggested that math class should be more fun, she changed her rigorous ways and became friendlier to her students. She has a Russian accent, and loves romance novels. She has a crush on Gordy, often referring to him as "handsome cleaning man" and is shown to wish to date him. In one episode she is revealed to have won bronze medals in Greco Roman Wrestling and Luge, and is shown on a cereal box with a hammer and sickle on it. She is in the Season 2 theme song.
Evelyn Kwong (Michelle Kim) A studious and a smart person who likes competition within her courses. At first, she had a bitter rivalry with Cookie and tended to despise him, but becomes initially interested in him after they accidentally kiss. She soon became madly in love with Cookie and seemed to torment him constantly, both competing against him to be the smartest student at Polk, and obsessively pursuing his affections. Evelyn finally stopped harassing Cookie and started dating Seth (who miraculously became smarter after spending time with her) in the Tests episode. She was also part of an organization squad to help Ned get organized in the episode Getting Organized and Extra Credit. In the episode, "Guide to: When You Like Someone Who's Going Out With Someone Else", she begins going out with Seth Powers. She also helps Seth by tutoring him in math, which helps him get much better. She tends to use intimidation to fulfill her goals.
The Scoop (Vincent Martella) The school's journalist and photographer. He tends to be quite annoying and assertive, which especially annoys Moze. He speaks with a Jersey accent and often wears a brown suit, a fedora, and carries around a camera. Scoop appears mostly in the first Season.
Mr. Chopsaw (Dave Florek) The school woodshop teacher. He has an unnatural obsession with woodworking and sometimes acts like he is "attracted" to the shop tools. He favors Moze as his best student and helps her through confusing times by giving her advice such as finding a talent for Ned's talent show and her feelings for Ned. He could immediately tell that there was something more between Ned and Moze. In the episode "Guide To: Hair" he has a strange new hairdo. He was also the very first teacher seen on the show. He was in the Season 1 theme song. His full name is Dusty Chopsaw.
Mr. Combover (Steve Bannos) The choir and music appreciation teacher. He also runs the school plays. He's known for liking the arts and classical music artists like Mozart and Beethoven, as well as having unusual facial hair that runs round the side of his face.
Dr. Lowe (Fred Stoller) A quirky character that does two jobs at Polk. He is seen as a study hall advisor and sometimes seen as the school's psychiatrist. He also seems to be the school bus driver in the episode The Late Bus.
Mr. Kwest (Dave "Gruber" Allen) He runs the computer lab, though he knows nothing about computers. He also runs a fantasy war game club and drives the bus.
Rose The Lunch Lady
Rose The Lunch Lady - (Loni Love) - A lunch lady who can see the future in the beans or peas and corn in one episode. Her predictions always come true but not in the expected ways. She can at times be very obnoxious.
The Weasel - A weasel that runs around the school since the series began (due to an untidy student's locker). Gordy wishes to capture this weasel and has used numerous traps in the series and failed. In one episode, Gordy successfully captures the weasel, but after finding a robot that was heading straight towards it, Gordy shows remorse and releases the weasel (and ends up being harmed by the robot). In the series finale movie, it is shown that the weasel is actually a female when she has given birth of new weasel babies. In one episode in season one, the weasel was elected Class President. In the episode Recycling (not season one), the weasel won the school's recycling contest after it stole the reusable materials collected by everyone else to use for a nest, including Ned's Guide. The 'weasel' was actually played by a ferret named 'Vanessa the Ferret'. The weasel and Gordy end up having a liking to each other near the end of the series.
Killer Bees - A group of three spelling bee addicted bullies, known as King Bee (Carlos Pena, Jr.), Queen Bee, and Stinger. They always dress in yellow and black and tend to quickly spell insults at people. They don't appear in Season 2. They always seemed to have an aversion towards Cookie because he was also good at spelling. Later on in the series they ask Cookie to be part of their group, but this was only so they could have their math grades changed.
Mr Gross (Steve Bannos) - A teacher with nil hygienic habits, which makes him have an extremely disgusting smell. He was seen only two times in the first season.
Backpack Boy (Kande Berry) - A student that carries an oversized backpack. He has many things in his backpack including flags used on the school spirit day, a pencil dispenser/sharpener, and a pouch that holds nose wipes. He is once shown as a superhero when Ned talks about the rumor that he was one. He has a crush on Claire Sawyer. In the episode "Guide to: Talent Shows", he appears at Talentpalooza and encloses Claire inside his backpack and throws it across the room. At the end of the episode, she emerges, and furiously states to Ned and friends that she's going to sue Backpack Boy.
Mike Grudzielanek (Joseph Ruzer) - A student who is a bully and also a jock. He is also in the choir. Although he appears a lot they only mention his name 2 times. It is implied that he might play basketball and football, and he is friends with Seth and Paul. It is also possible to say he got left back a year because he was seen with Jock Goldman and when the gang reaches 8th grade he is still seen in middle school.
Doug Secksay - A seemingly popular male student, who always goes surrounded by girls who like him. His face is unseen, since the girls cover him completely. But in the episode Valentine's Day his face is uncovered for a short time to ask Cookie where he got his roses, but you can't see it. He seems to be of Latino origins. Also, if you look closely, you can see part of his face in "Valentine's Day" when the girls go from him to Cookie. His last name is a pun on the word "sexy".
Palmer Noid(Cameron Monaghan)- A pesky redheaded fifth grader who later becomes a student in Season 3. He appears in 2 episodes in Season 2 & one episode in Season 3. He says the word "Cheesin" a lot. He is commonly known as the "kid who takes pants".
Albert Wormheimer - A geeky, schizophrenic student who is like Cookie but he's nearly overweight. He wears glasses like Cookie. He created the popularity list for Polk in Season 3. He picks his nose. He is a Virgo. He was part of an organization squad to help Ned. He was in love with a new kid named Bernice, because she also had the same round glasses, enjoyed math and picking her nose, and talked to herself. His nickname is "The Worminator"
Stu - One of Cookie's and Ned's good friends. He is shown to have a bad habit of biting his finger nails.
Vanessa (Logan Browning) - A student who was Cookie's girlfriend in Season 2. She doesn't appear in Season 3 because she split up with Cookie and went to high school.
Lance Widget - A heavyset nerdy bully who is also smarter than Ned, Cookie & Moze. He tends to be very loud and overbearing, shouting at people, calling nearly everyone a "moron", and constantly reminding people that his last name is pronnounced "wid-jay". He was part of the organization squad to help Ned in the episode Getting Organized, with his organization specialty being school gear. He also carries around a fanny pack everywhere.
Jock Goldman (Ben Hogestyn) - An upperclassman jock who used Moze to get back with his ex-girlfriend Amy Cassidy. After they broke up again, he begins to like Moze in Season 2. In the episode, "Guide to: Double-Dating", he asks Moze to a dance. To see if he truly likes her, Ned, Cookie and Gordy put Jock through a lie-detector test. Jock truthfully states he no longer has feelings for Amy Cassidy and likes Moze, prompting Moze to agree to go out with him. However, at the dance, Jock sees Ned accidentally kiss Moze (He believed her to be Suzie) and leaves her so Ned and Moze can be together. In the aforementioned lie-detector test, Jock also reluctantly admitted to Ned, Moze, Cookie and Gordy that he once got the runs after eating bad roast beef. This was revealed when Gordy asked Jock if he ever, "Pooped himself" (Which he initially lies to)
The Oboe Twins
Stacy and Tracy Oboe - Smart, nerdy twin sisters who both play the oboe. They are both extremely shy; they would never talk to anyone but each other, and were afraid to be apart. But in the episode Shyness Ned and Moze tried to help the twins overcome their shyness, though Tracey did so by copying another person almost exactly and putting "tr" before the vowel (i.e. with Lisa she called herself Trisa). They were the only ones seen in Mr. Wright's lame talent show.
Psycho Jones - A menacing student who looks like a psycho. He appeared in Shyness and Nicknames. He was angered when Ned (without knowing there is a Psycho) tried to get the nickname Psycho.
Nurse Hunscker - The disgruntled school nurse who grudgingly helps the sick students. She often has a sour attitude. In the episode Sick Days, her suspicions of Cookie having the flu had her trying to hunt him down and send him home, to no avail; she also prevented Ned from meeting Mat Hoffman after mistaking him for having a high fever. In Double Dating, she helps cure Ned of a case of the runs.
Timmy Toot-Toot - A student of James K. Polk middle school who is notorious for his dangerously powerful and frequent farts, preceded by him saying "Toot toot!". Despite this embarrassing habit, Timmy takes pride in his "tooting" ability, calling it a "super-power." He also became angered and felt that Ned was trying to compete with him when Ned accidentally farted in class in the episode Embarrassment. In another episode, Cookie uses him in a project to power a lawn mower by using his farts after eating beans, but things go wrong and an explosion causes his stench to spread throughout the school, making everyone flee in terror. He is played by Kelii Miyata.
Mr.Dren - A student Math Teacher in episode Teachers and Math from Season 1 and 2 Notice his name is Nerd backwards.
Lionel Scranton- Austin Butler - a background character who happens to be in a lot of episodes. He won Best hair. He's good friends with Ned, Cookie and Moze as shown that he sits with them at lunch. When Moze is trying to have a perfect kiss with Faymen he is also "The Kid With Doves."
Allan Alby-Jesse Heiman- Bespectacled, ruddy, and taciturn student who appears to be in many of Ned's classes. His only spoken line in the entire series is an excited "Yeah!" when he gets to use the CPR dummy.
Miss Knapp (Ellen Albertini Dow) - The elderly social studies teacher who always likes to sleep, as her name implies. She sets up a contest and the winning partners will win a trip to Washington, DC. Her replacement is Mr. Pal, the school's former principal.
Mr. Weiner (Marc Weiner) - A substitute teacher who used to be Ned, Moze, and Cookie's elementary school substitute. He has saved Ned from the girl's bathroom three times. He tries bringing his little grade school skits with him (including a large walrus with help from Ned) to Polk to make his students laugh. He is seen only in Substitute Teachers.
Marvin (Marvin Giovanni) - An avid student member of the G.E.E.K. Club at James K. Polk Middle School, where he helps train Ned Bigby into shape for tests. His idea of style involves a fauxhawk haircut, big black-framed glasses, a bow-tie, and, most importantly, a pocket protector with pens.
Martha Qwerly - An overly talkative student who is Martin's sister. She only appeared in "Tutors". She talks as often and fast as Martin. She also says that there are a numerous amount of Qwerlys.
Miss Splitz - (Melissa Peterman) - A bipolar school counsellor in Polk who spied on Ned if he did not get good grades. She speaks like R. Lee Ermey to Ned. She talks and looks nice to Cookie. She uses different methods for counselling each student, which tends to make her seem like she has a split personality (her last name being an obvious pun of this). Cookie thinks she's crazy.
Mr. Gibson - (Art Alexakis) - A music teacher who appeared for one episode in Season 2, his name is a reference to Gibson guitars. The song "Rock Star" by Everclear (the band that Alexakis is the lead singer of) was also featured in this episode.
Ned's Declassified School Survival Guide EpisodesList of Ned's Declassified School Survival Guide episodes (Selected episodes) Characters Creator
Wikimedia Foundation. 2010.