My Curse (song)

"My Curse"
Single by Killswitch Engage
from the album As Daylight Dies
Released	2006
Format	Compact Disc
Recorded	2006
Genre	Metalcore, hardcore punk
Length	4:05
Label	Roadrunner
Writer(s)	Killswitch Engage, Howard Jones

"My Curse" (sometimes incorrectly referred to as "This Is My Curse"^{[original research?]}) is a song by American metalcore band Killswitch Engage, the song is released as the first single from their fourth album As Daylight Dies. It reached #21 on the Mainstream Rock Tracks chart, surpassing the band's last breakthrough single The End of Heartache. The music video was directed by Lex Halaby, who has also directed videos for Hoobastank and Mudvayne. My Curse, along with the rest of the album, has been generally praised by critics but has received substantial criticism for breaking away from the style established in preceding albums, toning down their previously "harder" sound.

Music video

Description

In the music video, the vast majority of the lyrics are sung cleanly (not screamed), however on the album much of the lyrics including the chorus are screamed. The music video opens in a golden field with hills in the background, focusing on a woman in a white dress with the sun shining bright in the serene blue sky. Numerous stacks of books are also present in the field; some are scattered and messily thrown about, some have insects crawling on the pages. The woman is also shown lying on top of the books.

One book in particular is picked up as the scene transitions to a man dressed in black in a small, dimly lit study with only a little sunlight shining through the slightly open drapes; the mood of the room juxtaposes the mood of the bright and open field. As he flips through the book, Howard Jones is shown singing, and then the rest of the band members appear playing their instruments. The mysterious man in black continues to pull books from the shelves and continues to flip through them; whenever the contents of a book are shown, members of Killswitch Engage are shown.

The man gazes upon an empty bookcase as the scene transitions again to the field. The woman in white and the stacks of books are shown again.

The man, still in his dimly lit room, begins to return the books to the bookcase, and unrolls a large sheet of paper that contains plans for the arrangement of the books on the bookcase. The man painstakingly reorganizes the books on the shelf according to his messily drawn plans. Still, all the while books are shown being flipped through, exposing the band singing or playing their instruments, and the man continues to draw plans and scribble out sections of the bookcase. He stares out of the window and then sits on a chair, presumably thinking of the woman standing in the field.

The empty bookcase in the field continues to stand before the rolling hills and bright blue sky. The case is then shown completely filled with the organized books, and the scene shifts back to the man whose eyes then look back up, staring at a vacant section of the bookcase. His head turns to look at a black book with the letters "KSE" (which stands for Killswitch Engage) printed on the cover and spine. He retrieves the book, causing other books to fall, and flips through it. This time, it is the woman who is seen in the pages staring back at the man. The man places the book in the vacant space on the shelf, at which point white beams of light emit from the shelf as the man steps backward.

When he removes the KSE book, he is able to peer through the bookcase and into the yellow field and see the woman. He reaches out through the bookcase and into the field, and the woman in the white dress takes his hand. The dark study is now empty with a vibrant light glaring through the empty section of the bookcase. The man in black is now lying in the field next to the woman in white as they gaze into each other's eyes; they are then seen standing side by side, staring off into the blue sky beyond the hills.

The man in black is then seen back in the study, lying dead under the fallen bookcase and atop a scattered stack of books on the floor, holding the KSE book, which falls from his hand. The plans are shown once more with a bold red circle around an "X" at the center of the bookcase where the KSE book was previously placed as the video fades to black.

Interpretation

Much like the previous Killswitch Engage singles, "Rose of Sharyn" and "The End of Heartache" from The End of Heartache album, "My Curse" pertains to the theme of dwelling on a passed loved one. The woman in the white dress in the field represents the man in black's life with her when he felt happy and free. The dark study is an embodiment of his depression after her metaphoric death (To see you again/Dying, inside, these walls/ Dying, inside, these walls), and the books the man flips through throughout the video represent his memories of her. After her death, he dwells on her passing (I strain my eyes, hoping to see you again) and tries to find a way to be with her again (There is love burning to find you / Will you wait for me? / Will you be there?). Ultimately, his memories consume him; however, as his memories finally kill him, he is finally able to reunite with his love (And I see your face). The man's "curse" is that he is trapped in a life where he is unable to be with the woman he loves (This is my curse, the longing / This is my curse, time / This is my curse, the yearning).

In popular culture

• The song is featured in Guitar Hero III: Legends of Rock.
• The song is also featured as downloadable content for Rock Band as part of the "Roadrunner 6 Pack".
• The song is featured in Burnout Dominator and in Burnout Paradise.
• The song was used as the entrance song for Tim Hague at UFC 102.