- Miai
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For the Go term, see Go terms#Miai.
Miai (見合い, lit. "looking at one another") Match Making or omiai (お見合い) is a Japanese traditional custom in which unattached individuals are introduced to each other to consider the possibility of marriage. Since this "Miai" or "Omiai" was sometimes translated as "arranged marriage" in English and other foreign languages, which is a total misnomer, some foreigners misunderstand Miai/Omiai in Japan. "Miai" or "Omiai" is one of the arranged meetings with a prospect of marriage -- Match Making with genuineness and seriousness for future. In Edo era, "arranged marriages" happened in order to protect strong military alliances among warlords to ensure mutual support. However, this type of Miai/Omiai died out in Meiji era. Miai/Omiai has done for centuries in Japan can be described as "a meeting opportunity with more seriousness for future". Still of course after happily being a couple, it is not easy to decide whether to tie the knot -- there is no difference between Miai/Omiai and the others as a way in any country.
Nakōdo(Matchmaker) play a role as a bridge for the man and the woman, but Nakōdo is not always necessary as a description of Miai/Omiai. In ancient days (till Edo period) Miai/Omiai might be pretty much solemn but such a way is now only seen in movie and TV drama in/on Japan. Even though among people of this day Miai/Omiai is somehow considered more popular even after WW2 than now, many people who are over 90 years old now did not use Miai/Omiai as the way of meeting their partners. Such as about Nakōdo (match maker), how parents involve in, bloodline etc. which you might often come across in books or other about Miai/Omiai are all about old ways, it is not that many Japanese people living in now actually know about them well. Also, many description about Miai/Omiai for foreigners are not correct.
In English, since "Love Marriage" and "Omiai Marriage" are sometimes described separately, as opposed to each other, some people understand "Omiai Marriage" wrongly that "Omiai Marriage" has less love or there are strong interferences by parents. This is another fatal wrong idea of it, partly because of translation problems that often occurs between Japanese and English. After many dates the decision of marriage will happen, just like any couple, therefore there is no difference from marriage which is not involved in Miai/Omiai.
Miai is also a common Go term, even borrowed into English. It is a concept for describing pairs of moves for which if either one were played then the opponent would immediately play the other. Both alternatives would have equal significance for the game, so there is no advantage for either player to initiate the exchange. The miai concept is frequently used to simplify analysis of go positions.[1]
Contents
History
The practice of Miai/Omiai emerged in 16th century Japan among the Samurai class to form and protect strong military alliances among warlords to ensure mutual support.[citation needed] Later, during the Tokugawa Period (1603–1868) the practice of miai spread to other urban classes trying to emulate Samurai customs. After the Pacific War, the trend was to abandon this restrictive arranged-meetings system. According to a national institute research in 2005, it is estimated that around 6.2% of marriages in Japan are used matchmaking.
Nakōdo
A nakōdo (仲人 matchmaker) serves the role of a go-between between families in the miai process. Often Miai/Omiai takes place without any involvement of their families. However, there are various ways of Miai/Omiai for a long time as well, including "group miai/omiai" which is pretty much like a party held by match maker. The nakōdo can be a family member or friend, or match making company.
The general purpose of the nakōdo, especially the traditional way of Miai/Omiai is to provide introductions for people entering a new arrangement and to assist shy candidates.[2] The nakōdo is expected to play a variety of roles throughout the miai process. The first is the bridging role, hashikake (橋架け), in which the nakōdo introduces potential candidates and families to each other. The second role is as a liaison for the two families. This role helps to avoid direct confrontation and differences in opinions between the families by serving as an intermediary for working out the details of the marriage.
See also
- Arranged marriage
- Shotgun wedding
- Matrimonials Sites
- Matchmaker
- Culture of Japan
References
Categories:- Arranged marriage
- Japanese culture
- Japanese family structure
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