- Haim Ginott
Haim G. Ginott (1922-1973) was a teacher, child
psychologist andpsychotherapist , who worked with children and parents. He pioneered techniques for conversing with children that are still taught today. His book, "Between Parent and Child", cite book |author=Dr. Haim Ginott |title=Between Parent and Child : The Bestselling Classic That Revolutionized Parent-Child Communication |publisher=Three Rivers Press |location=New York |year= |isbn=0-609-80988-1 |oclc= |doi=] . stayed on the best seller list for over a year and is still popular today.Communications Approach
The following serve to illustrate Dr. Ginott's communications approach:
:* Never deny or ignore a child's feelings. :* Only behavior is treated as unacceptable, not the child.:* Depersonalize negative interactions by mentioning only the problem. "I see a messy room" :* Attach Rules to things, e.g., "Little sisters are not for hitting.":* Dependence breeds hostility. Let children do for themself what they can.:* Children need to learn to choose but within the safety of limits. "Would you like to wear this blue shirt or this red one?":* Limit criticism to a specific event - don't say 'never', 'always', e.g. "You never listen learn," "You always manage to spill things", etc.:* Refrain from using words that the child may repeat unwantedly
Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish were members of a parenting group run by Dr. Ginott and state in the introduction to their book that Dr. Ginott's classes were the inspiration for the books they wrote.cite book |author=Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish; illustrations by Kimberly Ann Coe |title=How to talk so kids will listen & listen so kids will talk |publisher=Avon books |location=New York, N.Y |year=1999 |isbn=0-380-81196-0 |oclc= |doi=] cite book |author=Adele Faber, Elaine Mazlish |title=Siblings Without Rivalry: How to Help Your Children Live Together So You Can Live Too |publisher=Perennial Currents |location= |year= |isbn=0-380-79900-6 |oclc= |doi=]
Quotes from Between Parent and Teenager
* "Rebellion follows rejection."Dr. Haim G. Ginott (1969), Between Parent and Teenager, New York, NY: Scribner. isbn=0-02-543350-4]
* "Truth for its own sake can be a deadly weapon in family relations. Truth without compassion can destroy love. Some parents try too hard to prove exactly how, where and why they have been right. This approach will bring bitterness and disappointment. When attitudes are hostile, facts are unconvincing." p. 38
Quotes from Teacher and Child
cquote|I have come to a frightening conclusion.: I am the decisive element in the classroom.: It is my personal approach that creates the climate.:It is my daily mood that makes the weather.: As a teacher I possess tremendous power to make a child's life miserable or joyous.: I can be a tool of torture or an instrument of inspiration.: I can humiliate or humor, hurt or heal.: In all situations, it is my response that decides whether a crisis: will be escalated or de-escalated, and a child humanized or de-humanizedDr. Haim G. Ginott (1995), Teacher and child: A book for parents and teachers, New York, NY: Collier. ASIN B000KY1E6K] “If you want your children to improve, let them overhear the nice things you say about them to others.”
Bibliography
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* Teacher and child: A book for parents and teachersee also
* cite book |title=How to talk so kids will listen & listen so kids will talk
* cite book |title=Siblings Without Rivalry: How to Help Your Children Live Together So You Can Live TooReferences
External links
* [http://eqi.org/ginott.htm#Notes%20from%20Haim%20Ginott's%20Books Extensive notes from two of Ginott's books]
* [http://www.betweenparentandchild.com/ Video clips, bios, revised text of Between Parent and Teenager]
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