Retirement Is Murder

Infobox Television episode | Title = Retirement is Murder
Series = Frasier
Season = 2
Episode = 13
Airdate = 10 January 1995
Production
Writer = Elias Davis & David Pollock
Director = Alan Myerson
Guests = Ron Dean (Frank)
Bill Gratton (Leo)
Hale Porter (Al)
Randy Kovitz (fan)
Mary Steenburgen (Marjorie)
Prev = Roz in the Doghouse
Next = Fool Me Once, Shame On You...
Episode list = List of Frasier episodes (Season 2)

"Retirement is Murder" is the thirteenth episode of season 2 of American sitcom "Frasier".

Cast and characters

Main cast and characters

*Kelsey Grammer – Dr. Frasier Crane
*David Hyde Pierce – Dr. Niles Crane
*John Mahoney – Martin Crane
*Jane Leeves – Daphne Moon
*Peri Gilpin – Roz Doyle

Recurring cast

*Dan Butler – Bob 'Bulldog' Briscoe

Plot outline

Evidence from the vice cop who handled the case is inconclusive. Helen appears to have written "HELP" in the ground after being shot (Daphne suggests this is because "'Howdy' would've been too cheery under the circumstances"), by a bullet which was pointing downwards despite her 5'7" height. One of her exes is in the clear: he has an alibi confirming that he was murdering someone else at the time. Another former acquaintance is a noted animal trainer called Clive Brisbane. Niles remembers seeing his show while at college.

After Bulldog's attempt at wooing Roz fails, he is left with tickets to a basketball game which he does not need, so Frasier takes them in the hope of distracting Martin from the case. Even during the match, Martin is still thinking about the case. This scene is notable for Niles' failed attempt to fit in, looking around to "plot his escape route in case of fire or urban unrest. Maris taught me that", taking the vendor throwing nuts towards him (aimed for Frasier) as an insult, and (while listening to headphones as a distraction) telling a latecomer who asks what the score is "West Side Story".

Later that evening, after a meal with one tiny flaw, Frasier looks at the evidence and comes up with an outlandish theory: Clive trained Helen's pet monkey Coco to kill her, out of revenge. Rather than tell Martin and make him feel inferior, having spent 20 years on a case Frasier cracked in minutes, he rearranges the photos and other evidence in a way that he hopes will cause Martin to reach the same conclusion. The second Martin looks at the new arrangement, he takes a step back in astonishment, he's seen something.After going to the police office with his theory, Martin feels stupid, realizing that it does not make much sense. Feeling guilty, Frasier reveals that he is responsible. Just then, a cop knocks on Martin's door, revealing that he was right; they pulled the suspect in and he soon confessed. Martin acknowledges Frasier's role ("it took my son and his PhD mind to crack this"), and Frasier explains how his knowledge of animal behaviour lead him to think that the monkey could've been responsible. The cops burst out laughing, as Martin's (correct) theory was that the vice cop, Shelby, was responsible – Helen was attempting to write his name in the sand. One cop asks whether the monkey's motive would've been insurance fraud. Frasier is made to feel stupid, especially when his attempted self-mocking Clarence Darrow reference falls flat.

Episode Title Cards

*"Retirement is murder"
*"Strangers in a strange land"
*"Use a monkey, go to jail"

Memorable Quotations

"Frasier has an idea for how to take Martin's mind away from the murder case: the basketball game"
Frasier: It's the archetypal male bonding ritual.
Niles: Couldn't we just go to the woods, kill something and have done with it?