The Adventures of Lano and Woodley

Infobox Television
show_name = The Adventures of Lano and Woodley


caption =
format = Comedy
runtime = 28 minutes per episode
creator = Colin Lane and Frank Woodley
starring = Colin Lane,
Frank Woodley
country = AUS
network = Australian Broadcasting Corporation
first_aired = 1997
last_aired = 1999
num_episodes = 13
imdb_id = 0118250

"The Adventures of Lano and Woodley" was an Australian comedy television show starring the comedic duo of Lano and Woodley (Colin Lane and Frank Woodley), consisting of two series which aired on ABC TV from 1997 to 1999. The first series was distributed on VHS and in 2004 "The Complete Adventures of Lano and Woodley" was released on DVD.

eries one

First screened on the ABC in September 1997. The series was produced by Working Title/Polygram UK. The episodes "Starquest" and "The Girlfriend" were directed by Bob Spiers (who also directed "Fawlty Towers" and "Absolutely Fabulous") and Mandy Smith directed the 4 other episodes.

Episodes in the first series included:
* "The Girlfriend"When Frank admits to Col that he is a virgin, Col sees this as a chance to show up Frank, so he invents himself an imaginary girlfriend called Jenny. But what starts off a trick becomes a bit more serious when Frank starts feeling left out and decides to move out.

* "One Simple Task"When Col tells Frank that he can't be Frank's friend, Frank worries and decides to prepare for a holiday together to strengthen their friendship. But when it's time to leave, Frank has forgotten to book the caravan. He digs himself deeper and deeper by lying about the situation.

* "Starquest"Col and Frank decide they're good enough to appear on a local talent show, 'Starquest'. After working long and hard on a musical/dance routine, they feel they are far better than any of the other contestants and deserve to be treated as celebrities. On the big night, things don't go exactly as planned.

* "The Wall"Col and Frank are working as valets, but when Frank takes 20 cents from a dashboard they are both fired. Col and Frank find out that either their next-door neighbour Mitchell, or themselves will be evicted if their apartment doesn't make inspection by the landlord. With the knowledge they are up against a perfectionist, their attempts to improve their apartment result in irreversible damage and a major cover-up attempt by the pair.

* "Tonight You Die"On Friday the 13th Col finds out that Frank is very superstitious. To help end his fears Col takes Frank to the local video shop to hire a scary video. Already spooked by the movie, they receive an anonymous death threat via a phone call, then numerous events threaten Frank and Col's well-being.

* "The Two Men"When Frank and Col decide to go looking for love in a local pub, they find themselves coming home with two extra people... two girls. But the next morning when the girls have left they find a police officer knocking on their door and accusing them of robbery. Lano & Woodley then become fugitives looking for who really committed the robbery.Frank is convinced that they are the two men.

eries two

First screened on the The Comedy Network in Canada in March 1999 and then screened on the ABC TV on Saturday 15 May 1999.

Episodes in the second series included:
* "Primal Warrior"Colin scolds Frank for "not being a man", and suggests that he, Colin, could get hit by a bus, and then what would Frank do on his own? Frank panics at this, which is what prompts Colin to set up a "find your inner warrior" retreat for Frank, in their apartment - complete with campfire!

* "The Pool"Frank is afraid of the water, because he can't swim. So Colin takes him to the big outdoor swimming pool for a beginners swim class. Then Frank drowns, and has to be rescued by a pretty female lifeguard, who gives him the kiss of life. He gets the wrong idea and sets out to impress the lifeguard, not realising her husband is a former Olympic swimmer, now only known from the "Penguin Muffler" ads he appears in.

* "The Easter Story"Frank goes around the flat, collecting old stuff to donate to the church's op-shop including Colin's favourite pair of socks. When Colin finds his socks missing, he assumes his neighbour, Susan has stolen them, in retribution for the offence he made to her lisp. This marks the beginning of a tit-for-tat battle which ends up in the middle of the church's Easter "Rock Mass", with Col and Frank wearing their neighbours dresses!

* "Game Show God"Col and Frank argue over which of them is the more intelligent, so they decide to settle the argument once and for all, by playing along with their favourite game show, Mindbender. Col cheats which leads Frank to nominate him to appear on the show. Meanwhile Frank tries to deal with his phobia of people with beards.

* "Mother"When Col's Mother dies, a corrupt politician named Vera Watkins makes a secret deal with Births, Deaths and Marriages, to pretend that she has a long lost son, as her political career reaches a landslide, and she chooses Col as he has no family left. Col believes that Watkins is his real Mother and Col gets himself into more than he bargains for.

* "I Love You Baby (Part 1 & 2)"At the prospect of earning a thousand dollars a day, Col and Frank impersonate baby photographers, and manage to get the babies mixed up. This prompts them to attempt to reunite the mother with the right baby. In the process they learn some domestic skills, Frank starts believing he and Colin are married, Kiss each other, end up with 2 babies in their care, and the police on their tail.

Recurring themes

* The song "Danny Boy" is sung or mentioned a lot throughout the series.
* After mentioning to various characters that they must love someone, the person usually angrily replies "Love him?... Love him?... I want to DESTROY HIM!"
* Frank has been known to give out a long whining yell throughout the series.
* Whenever either of the duo tell a story of their past, they often mention a friend named Russell (who is a different man each time)
* Whenever Frank mentions something that seems impossible to Colin, Colin lets out a long loud laugh then saying "ahh.... you're gorgeous".
* Colin normally gives very strong sarcastic replies to Frank throughout the series.
* Whenever they manage to be successful at something, they give a quick thumbs up and a very big smile to each other.
* When scared or intimidated Frank normally stands in a very stiff position with his eyes wide open and quickly fluttering his hands.
* Colin often gets burnt and after he does he normally says "Ooh! Burnies! Burnies!"
* Colin often refers to Frank as a "stunted little skinny man".
* The pair always got fired from a job at the start of every episode, except for "I Love You Baby, Part II", where it started off with Colin narrating a sequence of events that didn't happen.
* Frank would often sing "I wish that hadn't happened" after something bad happened.
* Often during the show Colin or Frank fall out of a window.

See also

* List of Australian television series

External links

* [http://www.lanoandwoodleylive.com.au Official Lano and Woodley website]
*
* [http://www.freewebs.com/colandfrankfansite/ Lano and Woodley Fan Site]
* [http://www.freewebs.com/colandfrankfansite/transcripts.htm Lano and Woodley Transcripts]