Living apart together

Living apart together

Living Apart Together (abbreviation: LAT) is a term for couples who, whilst committed to each other, decide to have separate homes rather than one shared residence.

The Times Study speculates that quantum of LAT relationships equates the incidences of de facto relationships in the UK. [http://property.timesonline.co.uk/tol/life_and_style/property/article1779831.ece "Couples that live apart . . . stay together"] "The Times", 12 May 2007: "New research estimates that there are now as many as two million couples who, despite being in a committed relationship, live separately. The number of couples who live apart together (LATs) is now roughly the same as those who live under the same roof. [...] Her findings bear out the first research on British LATs conducted by the University of Oxford research fellow John Haskey, who in 2005 estimated that up to two million couples were living in separate homes."]

LATs consist of three factions, concerning decision to keep separate domestic residences. There are firstly: the "gladly apart", and two minorities identified as being: the "regretfully apart" (due to work commitments, family responsibilities, legal/residency requirements, or other reasons) and the "undecidedly apart" (committed but not especially moving towards cohabitation at the time).

LAT research

Sweden, which has witnessed similar trends to the UK in marriage, divorce and people living alone, has seen LATs rise from 6% in 1993 to more than 14% in 2001/02. Two UK studies support this - research at Oxford University by John Haskey (2005) estimating up to 2 million UK couples were living separately, and research by Professor Sasha Roseneil of the University of Leeds ("On Not Living With A Partner", 2007).

Demographics

Whilst living apart appears to be more "popular among younger people" , the studies found "hundreds of thousands" of couples age 35 - 59 choosing separate living as well, including an estimated 14% of 50 - 59 year olds. Roseneil's conclusion includes that LATs are on the increase, and other experts are stated to agree that LATs are "now part of the social landscape".

The decision to live apart

Although research is far from conclusive as to motive, common themes suggested include the benefits to both individual and joint lives it confers on the couple and also on their children. LAT couples claim that these include:

:* LAT having "kept their relationship fresh while providing the ideal environment in which to bring up [...] children".:* Having both an intimate relationship and one's own space is a treat. [http://property.timesonline.co.uk/tol/life_and_style/property/article1779835.ece "Why we love this singular relationship"] , 12 May 2007] :* The anticipation of time together always being special.:* Having bases in two cultures – for example both a busy city and a country village.:* Freedom to do things without consultation, and the freedom not to do things in one's own abode.:* Independent finances and homes meaning that financial dispute and negotiation is not a source of friction in the couple's relationship.:* Ability to focus on work or one's own activities without interruption at times when one wishes to work.

Reasons also include emotional bases, for example "because a previous cohabiting relationship has broken down, or they do not want to impose a new partner on children from a previous relationship."

Professional views

Whilst professionals appear to consider LATs a viable lifestyle, it is an area requiring further research to determine long term sociological affects of LATs.

Opposition

Critics of LATs raise concerns that this social deconstructionism displaces the traditional family unit.

Example LATs

The Times cites the following examples of LATs: Woody Allen and Mia Farrow (different homes either side of Central Park, New York), Margaret Drabble and Michael Holroyd (married 24 years as of 2007, separate homes), Helena Bonham Carter and Tim Burton (one child, two houses next door to each other in Hampstead, London), and Booker prizewinner Arundhati Roy and husband Pradip Krishen (separate homes in Delhi, India).

References

ee also

* Love
* Trust
* Affectional bond
* Intimate relationship
* Loving relationship
* Long distance relationship
* Pair bonding
* Cohabitation
* Companionate love
* Significant other
* Polyamory
* Marriage
* List of lifestyles


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Look at other dictionaries:

  • living apart together — n. A situation in which an unmarried couple live in separate residences while maintaining an intimate relationship; a person in such a relationship. adj. Also: LAT. live apart together v. Example Citations: Another twist on the traditional family …   New words

  • living apart together — n. situation when a couple that is not married lives in separate homes but has an intimate relationship …   English contemporary dictionary

  • apart — a|part [ ə part ] function word *** Apart can be used in the following ways: as an adverb: We had to take the engine apart. after the verb to be : I m never happy when we re apart. as an adjective (only after a noun): Madagascar is a world apart …   Usage of the words and phrases in modern English

  • apart */*/*/ — UK [əˈpɑː(r)t] / US [əˈpɑrt] adjective, adverb Summary: Apart can be used in the following ways: as an adverb: We had to take the engine apart. after the verb to be : I m never happy when we re apart. as an adjective (only after a noun):… …   English dictionary

  • apart — a|part W1S3 [əˈpa:t US a:rt] adv, adj ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ 1¦(not close/touching)¦ 2¦(in different pieces)¦ 3¦(separate)¦ 4¦(not at same time)¦ 5¦(people)¦ 6 fall apart 7 be torn apart 8 be worlds/poles apart 9 grow/drift apart …   Dictionary of contemporary English

  • living together as husband and wife — Living as husband and wife, with voluntary recognition of the relationship and in the absence of design or agreement to live apart free from reciprocal marital rights and duties, irrespective of whether or not there is a common place of living.… …   Ballentine's law dictionary

  • apart — I [[t]əpɑ͟ː(r)t[/t]] POSITIONS AND STATES ♦♦ (In addition to the uses shown below, apart is used in phrasal verbs such as grow apart and take apart .) 1) ADV: ADV after v, oft ADV from n When people or things are apart, they are some distance… …   English dictionary

  • apart — adverb 1》 separated by a specified distance.     ↘no longer living together or close emotionally. 2》 to or on one side. 3》 into pieces. Phrases apart from 1》 except for. 2》 as well as. Derivatives apartness noun Origin ME: from OFr., from L. a… …   English new terms dictionary

  • living separate and apart — Exists where the spouses have come to a parting of the ways and have no present intention of resuming marital relations and taking up life together under the same roof, not where they are residing temporarily in different places for economic or… …   Black's law dictionary

  • living separate and apart — Exists where the spouses have come to a parting of the ways and have no present intention of resuming marital relations and taking up life together under the same roof, not where they are residing temporarily in different places for economic or… …   Black's law dictionary

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