Secrets of a Superstud

Infobox Film
name = Secrets of a Superstud
director = Morton M Lewis
Alan Selwyn
producer = Morton M Lewis
writer = Gerry Levy
Morton M Lewis
Alan Selwyn
starring = Anthony Kenyon
Mark Jones
David Rayner
Alan Selwyn
Heather Deeley
Raymond Young
Cosey Fanni Tutti
music = John Shakespeare
Derek Warne
Ross MacManus
distributor = Butchers Film
released = 1975
runtime = 90 min
country = UK
language = English
budget =
gross =
preceded_by =
followed_by =
website =
amg_id =
imdb_id = 0318674

Secrets of a Superstud, also known as It's Getting Harder All the Time and Naughty Girls on the Loose is a 1975 British Sex Comedy, one of many to be also filmed in a hardcore version for export. The film was shot at Twickenham Film Studios under the title “Custer’s Thirteen”, the general release prints and the hardcore version were processed at Kay Labs at Highbury, North London.

Details of the film’s hardcore version were leaked by the magazine Cinema X (vol.8.no5), after the magazine had become disillusioned by certain British filmmakers refusal to acknowledge they were shooting hardcore “at Cinema X magazine we know which directors have shot porno; we’ve talked to their stars. But its little use quoting them, when the directors, producers, above all their distributors, vociferously deny everything. We prefer honesty in our pages.”

Plot

Custer Firkinshaw (Anthony Kenyon) the owner of 'Bare Monthly' Magazine is up to his neck in dirty pictures and sexy secretaries. His hedonistic ways are however temporary halted when his Uncle Charlie dies and Custer is pitted against his relatives. His Uncle leaves Custer a fortune in the will, but only on the condition that he marries and has a child within 12 months, otherwise it all goes to his relatives. Custer’s money grabbing Aunt Sophie knows only to well about Custer's swinging ways, so keep tabs on him by hiring a crooked private detective Bernie Selby (Alan Selwyn). When Custer visits a doctor both parties discover that due to Custer's oversexed lifestyle he's only got 13 units of 'sexually activity' left, meaning he has only 13 more attempts to father a child.

When Aunt Sophie learns of this she plans to stitch Custer up calling on Selby to hire girls to seduce Custer and use up those potent 13 units of sexual activity. Thereon in its a race against time as Custer tries to find a suitable bride to impregnate while Selby’s girls pose as cat burglars, 'lost' neighbours and even drag up as meter inspectors in order to catch lure Custer into temptation.

ongs

Secrets of a Superstud also contains several songs that relate the film’s plot as if it were a western, using many double-entendres (‘Custer’s last stand’, ‘quick on the drawers’). The songs were written by Ross MacManus, and performed by MacManus and Laura Lee.

It’s Getting Harder All the Time (sung by Ross MacManus)

"I don’t know if I’m strong or weak,

Or what I say makes me unique,

But nothing seems to get me down,

I get my jollies walking round,

But everyday, I’m pleased to say, in everyway,

Its getting harder, getting harder, all the time,

Getting harder, getting harder, all the time, all the time,

I think I’m over it all again,

And then the pressure builds up on me again,

And it’s the tightening, the very screw,

That leaves me wandering what I can do,

But everyday, I’m pleased to say, in everyway,

Its getting harder, getting harder, all the time,

Getting harder, getting harder, all the time, all the time,

Getting harder, getting harder, all the time babe.!".

Custer Firkinshaw (sung by Ross MacManus)

"Custer, Custer, Custer Firkinshaw,

He rode the plains of fleet street,

But he rode the fancies more,

They’re were lots, and lots, of shots in Custer’s magazine,

But they were all of ladies,

The prettiest I’ve seen,

He always got his woman,

He hunted everywhere,

But the thing he hunted most of all was just a little bare,

That Mister Custer was quick on the drawers,

One day a rich old uncle,

Left him a load of loot,

But Custer needed to prove himself an honorary callute,

And rope and tie a heifer down to the marriage bed,

Start in and raise a family,

Just like the good book said,

I think Custer was more interested in cockfighting than gunfighting.".

This is Your Last Stand (sung by Laura Lee)

"I’ll set my trap wide,

And you’ll find yourself inside,

Busting, and fighting and struggling,

Will only get you further in,

I’m coming over the top for you,

And this is your last stand,

This is your last stand,

This is your last stand,

This is your last stand,

We’re almost there now,

Though it might seem unfair now,

You haven't got a lot to say,

And we have reached the bitter end,

I’m coming over the top for you,

And this is your last stand,

This is your last stand,

This is your last stand,

This is your last stand,

That was your last stand.".

References

Simon Sheridan, "Keeping the British End Up: Four Decades of Saucy Cinema" (2007) (third edition) Reynolds & Hearn Books ISBN 1-903111-92-7

External links

*
* [http://www.pre-cert.co.uk/cgi-bin/cms/Film/40256 British Video Cover]
* [http://www.pre-cert.co.uk/cgi-bin/cms/Film/43822 Alternative British Video Cover]
* [http://api.ning.com/files/ypdd0sAWBhq37B6D5Md*JzYzO04OX01Hw9vkEhgjap8_/KokSoaSSR.jpgIcelandic video release]
* [http://i313.photobucket.com/albums/ll387/vidmarc/IMG_1687.jpguk poster]