Norbert Colon

Norbert Colon is an occasional character in the British comic, Viz.

Norbert Colon debuted in 1985, an early creation of Simon Thorp, who would later become part of the Viz editorial team. He is a wretched and ugly looking old man who, being an extreme miser, goes to ludicrous extremes to save money.

He is described as being "as tight as a gnat's chuff"; but in his own words, "I'm careful, that's all".

For example, in one strip, Norbert Colon sees a pair of shoes in a charity shop for 2-pence. He promptly goes home, saws off his legs and sells his limbs to a meat factory for use in pies. Norbert gets paid 2-pence for his dismembered legs, and - rolling himself around on a makeshift skateboard - he goes back to the charity shop and buys the boots. Apparently, Norbert's annual budget is only 10 pence.

His first two appearances were both full length layouts. His first strip set the tone, with Colon beating up a charity collector and watching his teabag collapse after 127 uses. The second was a spoof of A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens, with Colon as Ebenezer Scrooge. (The story ends with Colon cooking Tiny Tim and serving him to the Cratchits in place of a Christmas Turkey.)

A 2007 strip found Norbert passing a butcher's shop window and admiring the cow's tongue for sale, but unwilling to pay the (perfectly reasonable) price for it. To be able to eat tongue without paying for it, he went home and cut off his own tongue, then ate it ... and discovered he was unable to taste it.

A similarly themed story, but more childlike, called Jasper The Grasper appeared in Cor!! in the 1970s.