The Goon Show cast members and characters

This is a list of regular cast members of the 1950s British radio programme "The Goon Show" and the characters they portrayed.

Harry Secombe

Neddie Seagoon

"Main article: Neddie Seagoon"

Uncle Oscar

Uncle of Henry and Min. A very old pensioner (Henry often asks, "What are you doing out of your grave?") who usually jabbers incoherently but soon collapses. When he is coherent, he can be heard enquiring as to the whereabouts of his teeth, or (as in "The Call Of The West"), he loses them - Henry remarks, "There go his teeth, Min - more dinner for us!" In "The £50 Cure", he is the first to be turned into a chicken after drinking Minnie's laundry soup.

Private Bogg

One of Major Bloodnok's soldiers who is usually picked upon to do all the dangerous/scary jobs that Bloodnok himself is too afraid to do. However, Bogg does appear as a civilian in "The Greatest Mountain In The World"; he announces himself as 'Sex: male; name: Bogg F, Superintendent, Ministry of Works and Housing', and declares that Henry Crun's artificial mountain in Hyde Park "will have to come down", quoting Section 9 of some obscure regulation: "No mountain weighing more than 8 pounds 10 ounces and measuring more than 20 feet may be built within a radius of Nelson's Column."

He then lays two lighted sticks of dynamite, which Eccles mistakes for two cigars.

Nugent Dirt

The first victim of " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/Phantom_Head_Shaver.html The Phantom Head-Shaver of Brighton] ". His wife Prunella takes him to court, and after a three week trial, Judge Schnorrer finally pronounces sentence - "Now, then, Nugent Dirt - the jury of three just men and twenty-nine criminals finds you guilty of hiding your bald nut from your wife until after you had married her.... Therefore - I sentence you to pay a fine of three shillings or do sixty years in the nick". Dirt replies: "I'll do the sixty years - I'm not throwing three bob down the drain."

Izzy

Based on the Jewish comic Izzy Bonn.

Welshmen

Secombe also played various Welshmen (e.g. a lorry driver in " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/raw/series07/s07e15a.html Wings Over Dagenham] ", and a navvy in " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/raw/series09/s09e14a.html The Scarlet Capsule] "). Members of the newsgroup [http://groups.google.com/group/alt.fan.goons?lnk=srg alt.fan.goons] refer to most of these characters as "Secombe Bach." In the beginning of the episode " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/raw/series08/s08e15a.html The Thing on the Mountain] ", all three Goons (with Milligan as Adolphus Spriggs and one line as Singhiz Thingz) imitate Welshmen. In " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/raw/series07/s07e15a.html Wings Over Dagenham] ", Secombe's Welsh character is named "Dai". There is also a Welsh Eccles, whose so-called accent consists entirely of words such as Abergavenny, Cardiff Docks, Swansea Docks and leeks; he later admits, "It's no good folks, I can't keep up this accent any longer, I'm not a Welshman at all." In " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/raw/series06/s06e16a.html The Mighty Wurlitzer] ", the first part of the story is set in Wales. Secombe (himself a Welshman in the role of Seagoon), Milligan (playing a cat) and Sellers ("à la" Mai Jones) end virtually every sentence with the Welsh word "bach" (which means 'small' - occasionally, a Welshman will refer to his 'butty bach', roughly translated 'my little friend'). Secombe dryly remarks after Milligan's lines, "That's the first time I've heard a cat bark."

Yorkshiremen

When there was a need, Secombe would often play the part of a Yorkshireman, usually un-named. One example of Secombe's Yorkshire accent is in the episode " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/Lurgi_Strikes_Britain.html Lurgi Strikes Britain] ", where he plays a bus conductor in Oldham (some of the outlying villages of Oldham were situated in the West Riding of Yorkshire at the time.), the first victim of the dreaded lurgi. He also uses the accent as a workman in "The Last Tram (From Clapham)", and as the Manager of the East Acton Labour Exchange in "World War I". In "The Macreekie Rising" he plays a dim Yorkshireman on guard at the Tower of London, using the name "Fred Nurke".

Spike Milligan

Eccles

"Main article: Eccles (character)

Minnie Bannister

"Main article: Henry Crun and Minnie Bannister"

Moriarty

"Main article: Count Jim Moriarty

Throat

Throat, Sgt Throat, Miss Throat or Gladys, with the very gravelly voice. Milligan invented this voice by belching, apparently in the middle of rehearsal, much to the producer's annoyance.

Little Jim

Little Jim, whose single line "He's fallen in the wa-ater" became a national catchphrase. According to a recent TV special about Spike Milligan, the phrase was originated by Peter Sellers' young son. In "The Last Goon Show of All", it was revealed that Little Jim was Eccles' nephew, and that apart from "He's fallen in the wa-ater", only Eccles could understand Little Jim's speech, even Little Jim himself having no idea.

priggs

Adolphus (later Jim) Spriggs, aka Jim Pills, who makes frequent appearances on the show. He often repeats his lines in a high-pitched falsetto and calls everybody "Jim", pronounced "Jeeee-eeeeem!". Also known to be a singer (of sorts): in " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/raw/series07/s07e25a.html The Histories Of Pliny The Elder] ", he serenades Julius Grytpype Caesar, whereupon the latter remarks 'Brutus Moriartus, this man is a bit of a crawler. Why does he follow such a profession?' Moriarty replies 'For money, Caesar, he says he wants to die rich.' Grytpype: 'And so he shall; give him this sack of gold, and then strangle him.'

Notably, in a few episodes, actors other than Milligan - such as Kenneth Connor in " [http://www.thegoonshow.net/scripts_show.asp?title=s09e17_the_50_pound_cure The £50 Cure] " - would attempt to imitate Spriggs' habit of singing the word 'Jim' at a high pitch, resulting in a fervent contest with Milligan as to who could hold his 'Jim' longest, sometimes interspersed with the character asking 'Are you taking the mick?'

Yakamoto

Japanese character who can be found as Eidelberger's sidekick (e.g. " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/Napoleons_Piano.html Napoleon's Piano] " and " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/Canal.html The Canal] ") or as a Japanese Army officer (e.g. " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/raw/series06/s06e25.html The Fear of Wages] ").

Cor blimey

Unnamed character who pops up to say "Cor blimey I'm off!" whenever something dangerous is about to happen. Voice very similar to Throat.

Thingz

Havaldar Singhiz Thingz, an Indian idiot, usually found as Bloodnok's servant. The various Indian characters in the show derived from Milligan's childhood in India, where his father had served in the British Army.

Hugh Jampton

Captain Hugh Jampton, an army officer but primarily getting an indecent joke past the BBC censors: "Hampton" - is Cockney Rhyming Slang for "prick" (penis) which rhymes with "Hampton Wick".

Fu Manchu

Fred Fu Manchu, Chinese Bamboo Saxophonist. Appears in self-titled episode " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/raw/series06/s06e12b.html The Terrible Revenge of Fred Fu Manchu] ". Makes minor appearances in a number of other episodes (e.g. " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/China_Story-06s3.html China Story] ", "The Siege of Fort Night" and " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/raw/series06/s06e03.html The Lost Emperor] ").

Peter Sellers

Bloodnok

"Main article: Major Bloodnok"

Grytpype-Thynne

"Main article: Hercules Grytpype-Thynne"

Bluebottle

"Main article: Bluebottle (character)"

Henry Crun

"Main article: Henry Crun and Minnie Bannister"

Cynthia

Cynthia, ROE (Rose of England), a breathy nymphomaniac femme fatale from Earl's Court. Neddie's occasional love interest, with a jealous lover called Raoul (played by Ray Ellington with a George Sanders patina). Jilted for an elephant. In "The Scarlet Capsule", the local residents need to be evacuated, for fear of an unexploded bomb. Seagoon knocks on Cynthia's door, and when she answers, he says "I'm sorry to knock you up so late...." (pause for the "double-entendre" to sink in), to which she replies: "They all say that..."

William "Mate" Cobblers

Willium "Mate" Cobblers, working-class cockney idiot, who played all sorts of roles, including soldiers, policemen and various menial servants. His catchphrase, "You can't park 'ere, mate", was a Goon in-joke that took a swipe at officious BBC commissionaires. (Sellers used a similar voice for trade union leader Fred Kite in the movie "I'm All Right Jack"). Based on a hardware store owner known to the Goons. When asked "What kind of wood is this?" he would respond "That's solid wood, that is, mate".

Mr Lalkaka

One of a pair of Indian gentlemen, the other, Mr Banerjee, was played by Milligan; on occasion, however, the roles were reversed, with Sellers playing Banerjee and Milligan Lalkaka. Conversations between these Indian characters occasionally used Hindi obscenities that both Milligan and Sellers had picked up. These were usually the subject of complaints by, surprisingly, elderly ladies.

Eidelberger

German anti-hero. Sometime Dr. Frankenstein, who invented Eccles, aided and abetted by Yakamoto. Camp Commandant of Stalag 10, 12, and 13, and nominal Kapitan, and Seagoon's accomplice in the plot to steal Napoleon's Piano from the Louvre. His full name when he first appeared was Dr Hans Eidelburger, but he later became Justin Eidelberger, as in "Just an idle bugger". This was another way the Goons would slip words that were then banned from radio into the script.

The voice that Sellers used for this character was similar to that which he later used for Dr. Strangelove.

Flowerdew

Camp person who makes infrequent appearances. Although one of the earliest established characters, he was absent from the show for a long period and reappeared in the middle of the show's run. Flowerdew is a dab hand with a sewing machine, especially when, as in " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/raw/series07/s07e01a.html The Nasty Affair At The Burami Oasis] ", Seagoon tells him to run up a flag. Also appears in " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/raw/series07/s07e25a.html The Histories Of Pliny The Elder] "; when he tells Seagoon to "Shut up! It was perfectly quiet till you came along!", Seagoon replies, "You're a sailor, and sailors don't care!". And in "The String Robberies", Seagoon's train arrives in Scotland with a great blast of steam - Flowerdew is mortified: "There should be a law against trains letting off steam when people are wearing kilts!" Comparable with the characters Julian and Sandy from "Round the Horne".

Cyril

A Jewish character, with an aversion to non-Kosher water. Bloodnok, being stereotypically British, is Anti-Semitic; when, in " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/raw/series08/s08e10.html King Solomon's Mines] ", Cyril is indeed drowning in "non-Kosher water", Blooknok exclaims "Goodness! A crocodile making straight for Cyril!", fires, and then exclaims tersely. "Got him. Now to get the crocodile."

Fred Nurke

Fred Nurke, who, in " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/Affair_of_the_Lone_Banana.html The Affair of The Lone Banana] ", vanishes from right under his mother's nose. Seagoon asks: 'What was he doing there?' Headstone the butler (Sellers) replies 'It was raining at the time, I believe' (another Jewish reference - see Max 'Conks' Geldray).

Gladys

A strange sexless thing that continually changed its voice and responded often with the phrase 'Yes Darling!'. This part was also played by Ray Ellington (e.g., see "Rommel's Treasure").

Lew/Ernie Cash

Another Jewish character, a deep nasal stereotypical voice; usually a fast-talking theatrical agent or impresario (e.g. " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/raw/series06/s06e14b.html The Greenslade Story] "), who cajoles actors in the wings with two broken legs to break another one. Based on a friend of the Goons. Occasionally appeared as a judge or magistrate. Sometimes called "Schnorrer".

Churchill

Sir Winston Churchill, who makes regular appearances as the PM. Looks for bits of paper in odd locations, approves crazy projects like atomic dustbins for the Christmas Islands and is suspected of throwing batter puddings at Clement Attlee.

Hearn

Hearn, Hern or Herne, also Herne Sales. An American character used for narration, outrageous announcements, parody sales pitches. The Goons referred to Americans as "herns", possibly because saying "hern hern hern...." sounded American to them. See also Lafcadio Hearn.

And more...

It is a measure of Peter Sellers' vocal talents that he was able to speak all Milligan's characters so accurately that Spike's absences from the show were undetected by listeners until the final credits were read. An example of this is the episode "The Macreekie Rising", featuring a harrowing exchange between Henry Crun and Minnie Bannister. Sellers had to take both sides of the conversation and clearly had trouble remembering which voice to use.

When Sellers himself was absent, as in " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/Spy_or_Who_is_Pink_Oboe.html Who is Pink Oboe?] ", anything up to half-a-dozen other actors and comedians had to be recruited to fill in for him.

Michael Bentine

Bentine was part of the regular cast for the first two seasons. As a tribute of sorts, unheard characters called Bentine are sometimes referred to in later episodes (e.g. " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/raw/series06/s06e27.html The Man Who Never Was] ")

Osric Pureheart

The archetypal absent minded professor.

Hugh Jampton (Bentine's character)

See Milligan's character above.

Other members

*Andrew Timothy – the show's original announcer (the father of the actor Christopher Timothy, who played James Herriot in the BBC TV series "All Creatures Great and Small"), who left the show after the first few episodes of season 4, claiming that he feared for his sanity. He did however make a brief pre-recorded appearance in " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/raw/series09/s09e14a.html The Scarlet Capsule] ", ('I would like to say that, whilst I read this stuff, I don't write it - fertannngggg!') and returned in 1972 for " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/raw/LastGoonShowofAll.html The Last Goon Show of All] "
*Wallace Greenslade – announcer, he opened and closed each show (often parodying the traditional BBC announcing style), and occasionally played himself in an episode, most notably " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/raw/series06/s06e14b.html The Greenslade Story] ", as well as other small parts (e.g., he was " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/Phantom_Head_Shaver.html The Phantom Head-Shaver of Brighton] ). Wallace was also noted for what Harry called 'a bad French Accent' in "Tales of Old Dartmoor".
*Ray Ellington (not related to the Duke) and his Quartet – singer and drummer. The popular Ellington Quartet acted as rhythm section for the show's orchestra. Ellington, whose father was African-American, also occasionally played small roles, mostly as African or Arab characters such as Chief Ellinga, spouting much gibberish masquerading as Swahili, Sheik Rattle'n'roll (" [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/raw/series07/s07e01a.html The Nasty Affair At the Burami Oasis] "), The Wad-of-Char (" [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/raw/series07/s07e17.html Shifting Sands] "), and The Red Bladder, and various Scottish and Irish characters. A lot of the jokes involving Ellington would these days would be considered racist; in "The Jet-Propelled Guided NAAFI" he was called Black Rod, a reference to the British Parliamentary office of the same name, and although his thick African American accent was nothing like Scots, several jokes were made about him being in the Black Watch (e.g. "The Treasure Of Loch Lomond"). In "Ill Met By Goonlight", Seagoon, Eccles and Bloodnok are part of the commando raid on Crete. When Seagoon complains that, although the party numbers four men, he's only been given enough black face paint for three, Grytpype tells him that Ellington is the fourth man, whereupon Ellington shouts, "It ain't fair, just 'cos I got a sunlamp."
*Max Geldray – Dutch jazz harmonica player (but no actor). Occasionally the butt of Jewish jokes, and more frequently, references to his nose - not for nothing known as 'Conks'
*Wally Stott and his Orchestra - the house band. Stott was a well-known British band leader and arranger whose other credits included numerous recordings for film and singing star Diana Dors. He also composed the music for "Hancock's Half Hour".
*George Chisholm – one of the show's regular musicians, sometimes called upon to play Scottish characters (e.g. "The String Robberies", "Wings Over Dagenham", "The Tay Bridge Disaster", "The Macreekie Rising", "The Spon Plague"). He was invited to "The Last Goon Show of All" but had to decline, responding that "his trombone was stuck in his tartan somewhere in Sussex".

Guest appearances

*John Snagge – doyen of BBC newsreaders who, like Greenslade, also played himself in several programmes (usually in pre-recorded inserts), and was a great supporter of the show. Snagge had a prominent part in " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/raw/series06/s06e14b.html The Greenslade Story] ", when he was present in the studio instead of being pre-recorded, and read his part in his best 'Here-is-the-News' voice.
*Valentine Dyall – radio's "Man in Black", often called upon to play sinister characters. Appeared as the Sheriff of Nottingham in " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/raw/series07/s07es2.html Robin Hood] ", the Christmas special Goon Show made for the General Overseas Service in 1956. Appeared in " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/Canal.html The Canal] ", as an amateur brain surgeon attempting to murder his children (Neddie & Eccles), as well as Lloyds insurance salesman Bluebottle, for the insurance money; appeared as Baron Seagoon in " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/Drums_Along_the_Mersey.html Drums Along the Mersey] ", with an elaborate scheme to smuggle a million pounds out of England; appeared as Dr Longdongle in " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/raw/series06/s06e20a.html The House of Teeth] ", a mad medic driven to knocking out men's false teeth and painting them black to fulfil a promise of fifty pairs of castanets to his Spanish flamenco dancer girlfriend Gladys la Tigernutta; appeared as the creepy caretaker of Tintagel Manor in " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/Spectre_of_Tintagel.html The Spectre of Tintagel] "; appeared in a rare non-sinister role as Lord Cardigan in "The Giant Bombardon", which was set during the Crimean War; deputised as Grytpype-Thynne for an indisposed Peter Sellers in " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/Spy_or_Who_is_Pink_Oboe.html Who Is Pink Oboe?] ". In the beginning of 'The Canal', Dyall is announced in his usual manner, as the Man in Black, with a gong-beat - only to read out, "Listeners - a funny thing happened to me on my way to the Theatre tonight...a steamroller ran over my head." After a brief laugh, he mutters "So much for humour."

*Charlotte Mitchell – stepped into the breach on the rare occasions (" [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/Tales_of_Montmartre.html Tales Of Montmartre] ", " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/raw/series05/s05e14a.html Ye Bandit Of Sherwood Forest] ") when the script called for an authentic female.
*Cecile Chevreau, another authentic female; made a cameo appearance in " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/raw/series08/s08e14a.html African Incident] ", being found in a compromising position up a tree with Major Bloodnok.
*Jack Train – made two appearances (in " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/raw/series07/s07e17.html Shifting Sands] " and " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/Spy_or_Who_is_Pink_Oboe.html Who Is Pink Oboe?] ") reprising his role as Colonel Chinstrap from ITMA. Chinstrap fitted into the Goon Show framework surprisingly well, demonstrating the debt the Goons owed to ITMA.
*Dick Emery – stood in for Secombe as "Emery-type Seagoon" in " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/raw/series08/s08e01.html Spon] ", and replaced Milligan in a few others, alternating with Graham Stark. Emery also appeared in the closest thing to a Goon Show film, "The Case of the Mukkinese Battle Horn" (which also featured Sellers and Milligan but not Secombe). He went on to provide voices for the Beatles' "Yellow Submarine", and was popular in his own television sketch show in the 1970s.
*Kenneth Connor – stood in for Secombe in " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/raw/series09/s09e17.html The £50 Cure] " as well as appearing as Willium Mate in " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/Spy_or_Who_is_Pink_Oboe.html Who is Pink Oboe?] " in place of Peter Sellers, who was ill.
*A. E. Matthews – appeared as himself in " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/raw/series08/s08e25.html The Evils of Bushey Spon] "
*Dennis Price – appeared as Prince John in the Goons Christmas special broadcast of " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/raw/series07/s07es2.html Robin Hood] ".
*Bernard Miles – appeared as approximately himself, complete with his best bucolic accent, in " [http://goonshowscripts.afraid.org/raw/series07/s07e16b.html The Rent Collectors] " On other occasions, e.g. in "The Silver Dubloons", he was himself parodied, probably by Peter Sellers.

References

The ultimate source from which almost all Goon Show character lists on the internet have been derived is
*cite book | last=Wilmut | first=Roger | coauthors = Jimmy Grafton | title=The Goon Show Companion - A History and Goonography | year=1976 | publisher=Robson Books | location=London | id=ISBN 0-903895-64-1| chapter = Goonography - Cast List | pages = pg.88Character descriptions were given in two of Milligan's books of scripts (he has written a back story to his characters which is not always consistent with the scripts) :
*cite book | last=Milligan | first=Spike | title = Goon Show Scripts | origyear = 1972 | year=1973 | publisher = Sphere Books | location=London | id=ISBN 0-7221-6079-8 | chapter = Introduction
*cite book | last=Milligan | first=Spike | title = More Goon Show Scripts | origyear = 1973 | year=1974 | publisher = Sphere Books | location=London | id=ISBN 0-7221-6077-1 | chapter = Introduction