Dwile flonking

Dwile flonking is an outdoor game of dubious antiquity predominantly played in Suffolk and Sussex in England. It is a game of dexterity and drinking, with the apparent aim of having a laugh and getting as drunk as possible.

Dwile Flonking

The pastime of Dwile Flonking involves two teams, each taking a turn to dance around the other and seek to avoid a beer-soaked dwile (cloth) thrown by the non-dancing team. [ [http://books.google.com/books?id=NWu6sLJn7-kC Encyclopedia of Traditional British Rural Sports] by Tony Collins, John Martin, Wray Vamplew]

'Flonk' is probably a corruption of flong, an old past tense of fling; and 'dwile' is a knitted floor cloth, from the Flemish 'dweil'.Fact|date=June 2008

Appropriate and seasonal dress is important. The BBC provides photos of seasoned flonkers [http://www.bbc.co.uk/suffolk/going_out/pubs/2003/09/dwile_flonking/images/team_member_270.jpghere] and [http://www.bbc.co.uk/suffolk/going_out/pubs/2003/09/dwile_flonking/images/three_team_members_270.jpghere] and the interested would-be flonker is well-advised to study them closely.

The Rules

According to [http://www.lewesarms.org.uk/history.asp The Friends Of The Lewes Arms] , "The rules of the game are impenetrable and the result is always contested." However, less alcohol-centric authorities provide more clarity.

A 'dull witted person' is chosen as the referee or 'jobanowl' and the two teams decide who flonks first by tossing a sugar beet. The game begins when the jobanowl shouts "Here y'go t'gither!"

The non-flonking team joins hands and dances in a circle around a member of the flonking team, a practice known as 'girting'. The flonker dips his dwile-tipped 'driveller' (a pole 2-3 ft long and made from hazel or yew) into a bucket of beer, then spins around in the opposite direction to the girters and flonks his dwile at them.

If the dwile misses completely it is known as a 'swadger' or a 'swage'. When this happens the flonker must drink the contents of an ale-filled 'gazunder' (chamber pot ('goes-under' the bed)) before the wet dwile has passed from hand to hand along the line of now non-girting girters chanting the ancient ceremonial mantra of "pot pot pot".

A full game comprises four 'snurds', each snurd being one team taking a turn at girting. The jobanowl adds interest and difficulty to the game by randomly switching the direction of rotation, and will levy drinking penalties on any player found not taking the game seriously enough.

Points are awarded as follows:
* +3: a 'wanton'- a direct hit on a girter's head
* +2: a 'morther' or 'marther'- a body hit
* +1: a 'ripple' or 'ripper'- a leg hit
* -1 per sober person at the end of the game

At the end of the game, the team with the most number of points wins, and will be awarded a ceremonial pewter gazunder.

History

The earliest definitely known game of Dwile Flonking was played at the Beccles Festival of Sport in 1966. According to [http://www.bbc.co.uk/suffolk/going_out/pubs/2003/09/dwile_flonking/introduction.shtml#fact BBC research] , 'No one can remember the score, although team members recalled feeling "pretty fragile" the following morning.'

The organisers were Andrew Leverett and Robert Devereux, printing apprentices at Clay's of Bungay and Clowes of Beccles, respectively, who had apparently been shown the rules on the only decipherable portion of a parchment document entitled: 'Ye Olde Booke of Suffolk Harvest Rituels', which George High of Bungay claimed to have found the same year while clearing out his late grandfather's attic. The inaugural teams were formed by employees of Clay's and Clowes.

Some suspicion was cast on the game in 1967 when the Eastern Daily Press ran an article which stated "inter alia" that the county archivist had failed to find any mention of the game amongst the county records. Dwile flonking featured as a key element in legal hearings later that year assessing an application for a licence extension to cater for the dinner dance of the Waveney Valley Dwile Flonking Association. The Waveney Valley Dwile Flonking Association went on to make their television debut on The Eamonn Andrews television programme in 1967, which resulted in letters from Australia, Hong Kong and America asking for a flonking rule book, although in the Australians' case this may have been a misprint.

Schott's apparently retcons the game claiming an [http://www.ahs.uwaterloo.ca/~museum/VirtualExhibits/Brueghel/dwyle.html historical evidence] in a 16th century painting by Pieter Brueghel the Elder: "".

References

* Finn, Timothy: "Pub Games of England" (Oleander Press)

Notes

External links

*" [http://www.bbc.co.uk/suffolk/going_out/pubs/2003/09/dwile_flonking/introduction.shtml The art of Dwile Flonking] " at BBC Suffolk, 11 September 2003.
* [http://www.lewesarms.org.uk/history.asp#DwyleFlunking Dwyle Flunking at the Lewes Arms] in Lewes, East Sussex
* Play [http://www.bbc.co.uk/suffolk/interactive/games/dwile_flonking/dwile_flonking.shtml Virtual Dwile Flonking] online, courtesy of the BBC
* [http://www.hutc.tv/ Video of Dwyle Flunking at the Lewes Arms from 2008]