Ring Dem Bells

Infobox Dad's Army
episode_number episode_name=067 - Ring Dem Bells
script=Jimmy Perry and David Croft
director=David Croft
producer=David Croft
recorded=Thursday 3/7/75
original_transmission=Friday 5/9/75 8.00pm
series=Eight
length=30 minutes
viewing_figures=11.3 million
preceding=Turkey Dinner
following=When You've Got to Go

"Ring Dem Bells" is the first episode of the eighth series of the British comedy series "Dad's Army", originally transmitted on the 5 September 1975.

ynopsis

The platoon are going to be featured in a film to help the war effort, but are annoyed to find they are playing the Nazis. Chaos ensues when they are mistaken for real German soldiers, triggering an invasion alert.

Plot

The platoon are to be featured in a film to help the war effort and are waiting for the producers to arrive, who will measure them for uniforms. Private Pike, a keen cinema-goer, is very excited and thinks he might even grow a moustache for his part. Meanwhile, Captain Mainwaring is in his office deciding which is his best side, to Wilson's reply that he perhaps doesn't have one. Sergeant Wilson then suggests that he should perhaps wear make-up in the film, to little enthusiasm from Mainwaring.

Once the film people arrive, it becomes clear that the platoon are going to be playing the Nazis, which is greeted with even less enthusiasm by Mainwaring. However, he is informed that they will be only in the distance anyway. Mainwaring is measured for his uniform, but they do not have an officer's, or indeed any uniform to fit him. Instead, Wilson and Pike are chosen to be the officers. Mainwaring protests and is excused from appearing in the film by the Colonel.

In the next scene, the platoon are dressed as German soldiers for their parts. Jones says that Kitchener, who used to say the helmets looked like saucepans, would turn in his grave to see him dressed as a Nazi. Meanwhile, Pike and Wilson are in the side office. Pike is greatly enjoying his turn as an officer, goosestepping around and acting like the German officers he has seen at the cinema. He then persuades his uncle to try a goosestep, and Mainwaring catches him while he is doing so. Mainwaring then informs the platoon that they must stay inside Jones' van to avoid being spotted and creating an alarm.

Once they reach the filming location, they are met by the producer who says that the filming has been postponed due to a problem with the lead actors, much to Mainwaring's disgust. He vows to voice his anger to Headquarters. On the way back, Mainwaring is forced to stop because Pike is doing Hitler salutes out of the top of the van. He halts outside the "Six Bells" public house to telephone Headquarters. Godfrey is feeling a little faint, due to being stuck in the van on a hot day, so Frazer opens the back doors of the van. Pike sees the pub and says to Wilson that, now they are officers, they should all go for a drink. Thus the platoon converge upon the pub dressed as Nazis, much to the shock of the landlord, especially when Pike orders the drinks with a German accent. The landlord tells his barmaid to warn the village, despite her initial disbelief.

Meanwhile, Mainwaring discovers what has happened and orders the men outside, where they are met by an angry mob. They accuse Mainwaring of being a quisling and he drives off hurriedly. The landlord telephones Walmington to tell the Home Guard that Nazis are heading that way. Unfortunately, the telephone is answered by Hodges and the Vicar, who think the landlord must be drunk. After going outside and seeing the backs of the platoon, who are still dressed as Nazis and overhearing Mainwaring saying that they weren't able to do any "shooting" that day, they decide to sound the alarm by ringing the church bells.

Initially the platoon think the invasion has started; then Wilson realises what has happened and they try to break down the church door to stop them ringing. Mainwaring tells Pike to phone Headquarters to inform them it isn't an invasion. After shooting the lock off (although it was actually bolted), the ringing stops and there is much accusation by all parties. Pike returns laughing to inform Mainwaring that the whole south coast was on red alert and the Brigadier himself wanted to know what "blithering idiot" was responsible. The episode ends with Pike informing Mainwaring that he has made him an appointment to see the Brigadier on Monday.

Notes

#This episode is one of Ian Lavender's two personal favourites.
#Jack Haig, who plays the landlord, Mr. Palethorpe, was David Croft's first choice to play Jack Jones.
#In Britain during the second world war, church bells were not used for regular sunday worship. Instead they were saved for invasion alerts. If you heard the church bells it meant the German invasion was imminent, hence the alarm when the church bells ring.
#Two popular actors are mentioned being cast in the parts of the Home Guard office and Sergeant with Jack Hulbert, postponing filming at the last minute to spend time with his wife Cicely Courtneidge.

Cast